Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

As we see nowadays a growing number of people with health problems are using treatments instead of visiting their own usual docotor and thats a negative development

lets start solving this problem from the beggining lately we notice in our socity people dont practice sport or go to the gym or even have a time to walk beacause of transprtation capacities like taking uber or having motorocycles and second problem is eating junky food while working or studing so all the people go to the street food cabines or conserved food and this is the point reaching to healt problems like having big weight and getting fat ot even respiration problems so because of this they use medicins and treatmenets to loose weight or even to solve respiration or even stomach probelems and thats wrong so i see that for people having no timr to bake launch at work is better to cook it at house and take it with them

and use their free time on weekends to practice some sport or walk and have a good time so it can help reduce their negatif energy and get a good mood

and for people who have a serious problems should visit their own doctors to get a help how they can solve their health problems naturally without any medicines or treatment jus by practising sport

AND AND AN A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A AA A A A A

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You state a clear view that relying on alternative treatments instead of seeing a doctor is negative, and you give related points about unhealthy habits and health problems. However, the response only minimally addresses the central comparison: it does not explain clearly why alternative medicines or treatments are risky, and the suggestion that serious problems can be solved naturally through sport does not adequately support your position. The discussion shifts towards preventing illness through diet and exercise rather than evaluating the development in the question. The response is also 10 words below the 250-word minimum; 10 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. To strengthen your answer, explain specific risks of delaying medical diagnosis and develop a relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is a basic sequence from your opening opinion to causes of health problems and then suggested actions, so a reader can identify the general direction of your response. However, nearly all the ideas are placed in one long, largely unpunctuated paragraph, making the progression difficult to follow. The repeated use of “and” and “so” does not clearly show how each point relates to the main question, and the shift from alternative treatments to exercise and meal preparation is abrupt. The final string of repeated letters also interrupts the response. Use separate paragraphs for your position, supporting reasons, and conclusion, and connect each point explicitly to the risks or benefits of choosing alternative treatment over a doctor.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some vocabulary relevant to health and lifestyle, including “health problems,” “junk food,” “respiration problems,” and “medicines and treatments.” This gives you a basic means of communicating your topic. However, the range is repetitive and several expressions are inaccurate or unclear, such as “transportation capacities,” “street food cabins,” and “reduce their negative energy.” Frequent spelling errors, including “docotor,” “beggining,” and “healt,” also make the writing less clear and weaken the impression of control. Aim for more precise, natural phrases and check spelling carefully. For example, use “rely on alternative treatments” for the central issue and “seek medical advice” when describing a visit to a doctor.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to express connected ideas using longer sentences and clauses, for example when linking unhealthy eating and inactivity to health problems. However, sentence structures are very limited in control: many clauses run together without full stops or commas, as in the long sentence beginning “lately we notice in our society.” This makes relationships between ideas hard to interpret. There are also recurring errors in sentence formation and grammatical patterns, such as “people having no time … is better to cook it” and “people who have a serious problems.” Use shorter, complete sentences first, checking subject–verb agreement, articles, and plural forms; then add a few accurately punctuated complex sentences.

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