Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

People who suffer from health problems keep trying different methods to cure their issues. At present, instead of going to the hospitals, patiens are choosing to follow traditional medicines and treatments. This is both a positive development as herbal medicines, accupunture or ayurveda can give relief from symptoms without any dramatic side effects, at the same time this can lead to not getting proper treatement for serious health concerns that could affect people negatively.

Traditional medicines and treatments have been used for thousands of years. They focus on holistic aprroach and do not have drastic long-term side effects that modern medicines can have. This can make people live an overall better life and manage symptoms. Moreover, patients tend to turn towards alternative options when they already have tried the modern medicines and treatments. For example, if a patient is chronically ill, he or she would need to have medicines regularly. This can have other side effects such as bone density loss of kidney problems. But traditional treatment can be used for a long time. On the other hand, a person dealing with stress can get acupunture that can help him relax.

However, traditional medicines and treatments often do not have scientific proof that they work for serious sicknesses like cancer. So, getting the alternative choices can delay the actual treatment needed for the specific problem. For example, a women diagnosed with cancer thought that she would get better with herbal medicines and accupunture. Even though they helped her to manage the pain and discomfort, her cancer got worse. Finally, when she went to the doctors, there was nothing that they could do.

In conclusion, alternative options can benefit people when they do not have any other choices, or the usual method did not work for them. But to be dependent on it entirely could be risky. They could be used alongside doctor's advice.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

Your position is clear: alternative treatments can offer benefits, but relying on them instead of medical care can be dangerous. You address both sides and support them with relevant examples, including symptom relief for chronic illness and the cancer case where treatment was delayed. This meets the task well. To make the discussion more fully developed, explain more precisely when alternative treatments are appropriate and distinguish using them alongside medical advice from using them as a substitute. Some claims, such as traditional treatments having no drastic long-term side effects, are broad; qualify them or support them with evidence. This would make your reasoning more balanced and precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response has a clear overall progression: an introduction presents the mixed position, the body paragraphs discuss benefits and risks, and the conclusion gives a practical qualification. Paragraphing is appropriate, and signposts such as “Moreover,” “On the other hand,” and “However” help readers follow the contrast. To strengthen cohesion further, make the relationship between ideas more explicit in places. For example, the chronic-illness example and the acupuncture example are placed together, but a clearer link explaining how each illustrates a different benefit would improve the paragraph’s flow. The conclusion’s “They” could also refer more clearly to alternative treatments. Overall, the organisation is logical, with some room for more precise linking and referencing.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “holistic approach,” “chronically ill,” “side effects,” and “scientific proof,” which allows you to discuss both benefits and risks. There are also attempts at less common terms, though some are inaccurate or imprecise: “traditional medicines” is used broadly where “alternative treatments” may be clearer, and “getting the alternative choices” is an awkward phrase. Several spelling errors, including “patiens,” “accupunture,” and “treatement,” reduce accuracy. Aim to check spelling carefully and choose collocations that sound natural in this topic. More precise wording for claims about evidence and treatment would also help you express your ideas with greater control.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex structures, including conditional and contrastive forms, as in “if a patient is chronically ill” and “Even though they helped her…”. Meaning is generally clear, but some grammatical errors remain. In the opening, “This is both a positive development as…” creates an awkward sentence structure; separate the two sides or use a clearer linking construction. In “a women diagnosed with cancer,” the article and noun form do not agree, and “side effects such as bone density loss of kidney problems” needs a clearer grammatical link between the examples. The final sentence, “They could be used alongside doctor's advice,” also has unclear reference and possessive form. Review sentence boundaries, agreement, and articles to improve accuracy.

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