Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

These days, a significant number of people with medical problems are trying other medications rather than going to their physician. In my opinion, this is a negative development.

On the one hand, taking medicines which are not recommended by a physician can have a deterimental effect. This is because, some medicines can have negative effect or the person can take overdose amount of medicine. For instance, a pregnant woman cannot take any medicines by herself unless it is prescribed by a responsible doctor. If she takes any medication by herself, it might harm herself and the fetus as well. So taking medicine by yourself not only overdose, but it can also result in fatality. To avoid this, taking medicines which are only recommended by a physician is the right way.

On the other hand, trying other treatments without going to a doctor can make other disease undiagnosed. To know the exact type of illness it needs further assessment with the help of medical laboratory. For instance, a person who has fever can take paracetamol to lower the temperature, but the exact diease can only be identified by a proper medical examination. Therefore, trying to cure diseases using other medications without going to usual physician can make other health problems such as, cancer, heart problems undiagnosed. As a result the undiagnosed disease can be left untreated which can have a negative effect on the person in the furure.

In conclusion, taking other treatments to cure a medical problem is a negative development. In my opinion, this can result in fatality, over dose and other serious medical problems can be left undiagnosed and untreated.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction and conclusion: you consider replacing a usual doctor with alternative treatment a negative development. Both body paragraphs give relevant reasons, including risks from self-medication and the possibility of an illness remaining undiagnosed. The pregnancy example and the fever example help make these points concrete. This covers the task well, but some ideas are more fully explained than others: the first paragraph focuses mainly on taking medicines without advice, while the prompt also concerns alternative treatments more broadly. The claim that this could leave cancer or heart problems undiagnosed would be stronger with a clearer explanation of how relying on alternative care delays diagnosis. More precise development of that link would make the argument more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs present separate reasons, and a conclusion restates the position. Signposting such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” makes the progression easy to follow. Examples are generally placed beside the points they support. However, the contrast markers suggest two opposing sides, although both paragraphs support your negative position, so “Firstly” and “Furthermore” would express the relationship more accurately. Some links are also mechanical, particularly the repeated use of “For instance,” “Therefore,” and “As a result.” The sentence beginning “So taking medicine by yourself…” is not smoothly connected to the preceding explanation. More varied, precise transitions and clearer links between claims would improve flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate your main ideas, including “prescribed,” “medical examination,” “undiagnosed,” and “untreated.” These choices show some ability to discuss health risks beyond very basic terms. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, spelling, or collocation errors reduce precision: “deterimental,” “diease,” and “furure” are misspelled, while “overdose amount of medicine” and “other disease” are unnatural or unclear. Repetition of “medicine,” “doctor,” and “negative” also makes the expression less flexible. Aim to learn common health-related collocations and check spelling carefully; more accurate phrasing would help you express the argument with greater clarity and control.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including conditional structures such as “If she takes any medication by herself, it might harm…” and a relative clause in “a person who has fever.” Most of the argument remains understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “some medicines can have negative effect” needs an article or plural form, and “the exact type of illness it needs further assessment” lacks a clear grammatical subject and connection. The construction “not only overdose, but it can also result in fatality” is also incomplete and unbalanced. There are occasional punctuation problems, such as the comma after “because.” Work on complete clause structure, articles, and parallel constructions while continuing to use complex sentences.

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