Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Recently, a lot of individuals with health problems are prefering to try a different types of cures instead of following up with their doctor. I believe that this is a negative phenomenon which may cause many dangerous consequences to human health.

The main reason why I think this case consider a negative development is that, people with health problems didn't have the enough knowledge about these alternative medecines, also they didn't have the authority to prescribe it for others. For example, if a patient with problems in his respiratory system had decided to try a new cure by himself, this could harm him worestly. Furthermore, doctor roles can't be neglegted as they have the proper science, education and experience to deal with health problems and give the suitable treatment according to each personal case.

Another reason makes a negative impact is that, the more the number of people try a new medicines without doctor's consultancy, the more the resistance colud be formed by their bodies. For instance, the intake of antibiotics with wrong doses could harm the patient by making bacteria form anti-bodies which can resist these groups of antibiotecs in the future and this make people loss the advantage of the proper treatment of their health problems in most cases.

In conclusion, while a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative cures instead of visiting doctor, this can lead to make diseases to widely spread and can make most of them loss their defensive immune system over time. I believe this would have a negative consequences on people health, and governments should increase the people awareness about this.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction: you regard replacing a usual doctor with alternative treatments as negative, and you maintain this view in the conclusion. You give two relevant reasons—patients may lack the knowledge to choose treatments safely, and inappropriate antibiotic use may contribute to resistance—and support them with examples. This addresses the task, but the development is uneven. The respiratory-treatment example is hypothetical and not explained in detail, while the antibiotic point is more specific but needs a clearer link to alternative medicine, since antibiotics are conventional medicines. The conclusion also introduces disease spread and weakened immunity without establishing these effects in the body. Develop each claim carefully and distinguish alternative therapies from unsupervised use of medicines.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs present separate reasons, and a conclusion restates your position. Sequencing phrases such as “Furthermore,” “Another reason,” and “For instance” help readers follow the argument. This gives the essay a coherent progression, though some connections are mechanical or unclear. For example, “Another reason makes a negative impact” does not smoothly introduce the next point, and the conclusion’s claims about disease spread and immune defences are not clearly connected to the preceding reasoning. Some sentences also contain several ideas joined by commas, making relationships harder to follow. Use more precise transitions and ensure each paragraph develops one clearly linked line of reasoning.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use vocabulary relevant to health and treatment, including “respiratory system,” “antibiotics,” “resistance,” and “proper treatment,” so the topic is generally understandable. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “negative phenomenon” and “defensive immune system.” However, word choice, collocation, and spelling errors are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning difficult to interpret: “a different types of cures,” “harm him worestly,” “doctor roles,” and “make people loss the advantage” are not natural or accurate expressions. Several spellings, including “medecines,” “neglegted,” and “antibiotecs,” also reduce precision. Build a reliable set of health-related collocations and check spelling and word forms carefully before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including conditional structures such as “if a patient … had decided … this could harm him” and a comparative pattern beginning “the more the number of people try …, the more…”. These attempts show some range, but control is inconsistent, and errors often make sentences difficult to process. Examples include “individuals … are prefering,” “a different types,” “the main reason … is that, people,” and “this make people loss.” There are also problems with articles, agreement, verb forms, and sentence boundaries, particularly where commas join clauses. Practise building accurate subject–verb patterns and checking each clause independently; then use complex structures only when their grammar is secure.

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