Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-17
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
It is very common for people to change both their habits and their opinions as they get older.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Older people may physically and mentally decline while it is true that when people get older than their habits and opinions are changed, I firmly agree with the view that older people suffered from critical thinking and their environment due to several compelling reasons. This essay will not only elaborate on my viewpoint but also provide relevant examples to support it.
To commence with, one of the most significant reasons is the older people suffered from critical thinking due to loneliness or sometime family issues. This can be attributed to the fact that sometime children like to live far from their parents owing to study or job that time their parents cannot share their feelings with others. In other words, it might be herculean for them. For example, In Singapore most of the older people living in nursing homes because their children living in another countries, so they cannot take care of their parents and old parents are suffering from mental diseases. This clearly demonstrate that in old age memory become slow.
Nevertheless, another crucial factor to consider is that environment put effect on the people when they get older. Furthermore, if there are good calm environment then old people feel like young one but if the environment disturbed then old people might be stressed. Environment plays vital role in their life. A particularly good example of this is older people may get depression or dementia in disturbed environment. Consequently, they want calm environment like they want to play with children because while the get older their mind worked like a child. Thus, it is evident that environment should be healthy.
In conclusion, although it is very usual that people to swap their habits and opinions as they aging, I strongly believe that the impact of the changed them physically and mentally because all the body functions reduced with aging. Therefore, take care of the older people may become them younger and they can live long.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by discussing whether habits and opinions change with age, but the main position is somewhat confused. In the introduction, the student states they firmly agree that older people suffer from critical thinking and their environment, which does not directly mirror the prompt's focus on changing habits and opinions. While ideas regarding loneliness, mental decline, and living environments are presented, they are often under-developed and drift into tangents about physical health and nursing homes rather than focusing closely on cognitive shifts, habits, and opinions. Consequently, the argument lacks consistent focus and logical extension throughout the body paragraphs, aligning best with a Band 5 performance.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into four distinct paragraphs, showing an attempt at a standard essay structure. However, logical progression is frequently hindered by awkward transitions and confusing referencing. For instance, the phrase 'To commence with' is used to open the first body paragraph, but the subsequent flow of ideas is disjointed. Cohesive devices such as 'Furthermore', 'Consequently', and 'Thus' are used, but they often appear mechanical or fail to connect the sentences logically. Paragraphing is present, but internal cohesion is weak, with abrupt shifts between ideas, placing the response firmly at Band 5.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The student demonstrates a limited and repetitive range of vocabulary. Words such as 'environment', 'older', and 'people' are overused. There are noticeable word-choice and collocation errors throughout the text, such as 'older people suffered from critical thinking', 'the environment put effect on the people', and 'mind worked like a child'. Some attempts are made to use less common vocabulary like 'herculean', 'compelling', and 'dementia', but these are often used inappropriately or awkwardly. These lexical inadequacies and frequent inaccuracies cause some difficulty for the reader, fitting the Band 5 descriptors.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The text displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but attempts at complex structures frequently result in serious grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Examples of faulty grammar include 'while it is true that when people get older than their habits and opinions are changed', 'sometime children like to live far from their parents owing to study or job that time their parents cannot share', and 'while the get older'. Punctuation errors and run-on sentences are common, and frequent basic errors in verb tenses, prepositions, and clause structures cause noticeable difficulty for the reader, characteristic of a Band 5 score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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