Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is very common for people to change both their habits and their opinions as they get older.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

I would like to share a story about my sister that i experienced recently

She graduated from high school in 2024 she choose to became a Engineer she joined in college everything was good suddenly she changed her mind and wana become a Artist its quite different proffision

I Agree with her choice eventhough its quite late she is the one go through with all the ups and downs that might come my mom was bit worried about her choice

but I'm sure she can achieve this because I'm growup by seeing her sge is very good at art i belive art is not only about skills and also how the artist understands

*she is good at Art

*She had that ability to think and understand the phage that she is going through

As a soster i always supports her choice astand for her if situation demands

The best example which proofs her she got Goldadel in art when she was in her school

By change with the time and maturity that she got to know sabout what he wants in her life

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You give a relevant personal example—your sister changing from engineering to art—and your support for her choice makes your general agreement understandable. However, the response focuses almost entirely on this one story and does not clearly explain how people’s habits, as well as their opinions, change with age. The reasons are also only briefly stated: her artistic ability and school award are mentioned, but their connection to maturity or changing priorities is not fully explained. The response is 183 words, below the required 250, so there is not enough development to address the task fully. To strengthen your answer, state your position directly, discuss both habits and opinions, and extend the example with clear explanations.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has a recognisable central thread: your sister’s change of career choice and your support for her. This gives the reader a basic sense of what the example is about. However, ideas are not arranged into clear paragraphs, and several points appear as disconnected statements, including the two asterisked lines about her artistic ability. The opening sentence does not lead smoothly into the story, while the final sentence is difficult to connect to the preceding example. Linking expressions such as “suddenly,” “but,” and “by” are used, but relationships between ideas are often unclear. Organise the response into an introduction, developed body paragraphs, and a conclusion, and use clear transitions to show how each point supports your view.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some vocabulary relevant to the example, including “graduated,” “choice,” “ability,” and “achieve,” and the contrast between engineering and art is clear enough to identify the topic. However, the range is limited and several spelling or word-choice errors make parts of the response difficult to understand, such as “proffision,” “soster,” and “phage.” Some expressions are also imprecise, for example “go through with all the ups and downs” and “By change with the time.” Aim to use accurate phrases for discussing changing views and life choices, and check spelling carefully. More precise vocabulary would help you explain not only what your sister chose, but why her priorities or opinions may have changed as she matured.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to connect ideas in longer sentences, for example when describing your sister’s change of direction and your mother’s concern. However, sentence boundaries and verb forms are frequently inaccurate, which sometimes makes the meaning hard to follow. The opening has no clear punctuation between “2024” and “she,” and “she choose to became” combines incorrect verb forms. Other examples include “I'm growup by seeing her” and “I always supports her choice,” where the verb patterns and agreement are not controlled. Most sentences rely on simple structures, with limited accurate use of complex forms. Practise separating complete ideas with full stops, and check subject–verb agreement and verb forms after “to” and in past-tense narratives.

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