Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is very common for people to change both their habits and their opinions as they get older.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is widely argued that individuals change their points of views and their behaviors when they become more older. while some people believe that they maintain the same habits and beliefs throughout their lives. I agree with this view to a large extent. this essay will explain the main reasons for my position.

the first reason why i hold this view is that people when they get older they become more mature and aware about the life itself. In other words, experience of studies and work side has many effects on our vision for existence, for exemple someone who studied psychology he will see people reactions in other way completely different because he understood the effect of the traumas and some other psychlogic troubles on the behavio of peoples, so now he does't judge anyone and he becom more concient. Another important reason is that becoming older can also affect habits of people, this means that their system nervous will change through the activities they do for exemple someone who was usually lazy when he just start working he will become more activ. As a result, it is reasonable to argue that age can really change us from the inside to outside in many ways.

Admittedly, opponents may claim that people can also preserve the same way of living with the same ideas and beliefs. because they believe that everything is programmed since the childhood life. However, this argument is less convincing, since some reserach it denies that. Therefor desepit the opposing view, i still believe that individuals changes throughout their lives.

In conclusion, although there is some truth in the argument that say people don't change, I strongly believe that all humain being can change when they get older because of many reasons.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you agree that people change as they age, and you give relevant reasons about maturity, experience and work affecting habits. The psychology example helps illustrate how learning can change someone’s judgments. However, the response only partly develops the task: the claim that the nervous system changes through activities is asserted rather than explained, and the opposing view that beliefs are formed in childhood is dismissed with the vague reference to “some research” without identifying evidence. The conclusion repeats your position but does not draw together the reasons. To strengthen the response, explain each cause-and-effect link more fully and use a specific, credible example to support your claims.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, two paragraphs presenting reasons, a paragraph acknowledging an opposing view, and a conclusion. Sequencing is generally easy to follow, and phrases such as “In other words,” “As a result,” and “However” signal relationships between ideas. At times, though, cohesion is mechanical or unclear. The opening says “while some people believe” without completing the contrast smoothly, and the long psychology example runs through several points without clear sentence boundaries. The reference to “some research” is also too vague to connect convincingly to the rebuttal. Use clearer links between claims and examples, and divide extended explanations into shorter, logically connected sentences.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of vocabulary for discussing personal development, including “mature,” “aware,” “experience,” “beliefs,” and “preserve.” These choices help communicate the main argument, and terms such as “traumas” and “programmed” show an attempt to express more specific ideas. However, inaccurate word forms, spelling and collocations are noticeable and sometimes make the reader pause: examples include “points of views,” “psychlogic troubles,” “behavio,” and “more activ.” Some expressions are also imprecise, such as “the life itself” and “system nervous.” Aim for accurate, natural combinations rather than more complicated wording; proofreading spelling and checking common collocations would make your ideas clearer and more convincing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex structures, including a reason clause (“the first reason why…”) and a concession beginning “although.” This gives the response some variety, but control is inconsistent: complex sentences often contain several grammatical problems, and errors can make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. For example, “people when they get older they become” repeats the subject, while “someone who studied psychology he will see” combines incompatible clause patterns. There are also problems with agreement and verb forms, as in “individuals changes,” and sentence boundaries and capitalization are unreliable. Practise building one clear main clause before adding subordinate clauses, and check subject–verb agreement, articles and punctuation during revision.

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