Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that international sports events, such as The Olympics or the Football World Cup, are a good way to bring countries together. Others say that these events create competition, not friendship, between countries.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

It is an irrefutable fact that international sports games brings nations together which was always debatable has now become more controversial with many people claiming that it is benefical while others reject this notion. The substainial influence of this trend has sparked controversy over the potential impact in recent years, In this eassy, I shall explain my point of view by analysing and thus will lead to a plausible conclusion.

To commence with , there are numerous of arguments in favour of my belief but from the fact that international sports such as olympics or football world cup events enhance good relation by meeting even they can learn distinct culture.Another pivotal aspect of this trend is that players from different nations learn about their mistakes instead of making them enemies even its an elite way to learn differnt skills .

To cite,an exmaple, data from reseach pointed out that more than 70 percent of the people were in favour of tosay all these merits stand in good stead

However, there are several demerits but one of the

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response identifies the topic and gives some relevant reasons why international sports may build relationships, including opportunities to meet people, learn about other cultures and develop skills. However, the task asks you to discuss both views and give your own opinion, and the opposing view is only introduced in the unfinished phrase “there are several demerits but one of the”. No explanation of how events can create rivalry, or a clear concluding opinion, is provided. The supporting example is also incomplete and difficult to interpret. The response is 177 words, below the required 250, which leaves the main ideas substantially under-developed. To improve, explain both perspectives, state your position clearly, and support each point with a complete, relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is an attempt to organise the response with an opening paragraph and a body paragraph, and signposts such as “To commence with” and “However” indicate an intended progression. However, the argument does not develop in a complete sequence: the second viewpoint begins but stops mid-sentence, and there is no conclusion to bring the discussion together. Several links between ideas are unclear, particularly in “by meeting even they can learn distinct culture,” while the example beginning “To cite, an example” is not integrated into a clear supporting point. Some transitions sound formulaic rather than guiding the reader through the reasoning. Use one paragraph for each view, connect each example directly to its claim, and finish with a concise statement of your opinion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related and formal vocabulary, including “international sports,” “controversy,” “pivotal aspect,” and “distinct culture.” This shows some willingness to use less common expressions. However, several choices or spellings are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “substainial influence,” “benefical,” “eassy,” and “learn about their mistakes instead of making them enemies.” The phrase “good relation” is also imprecise for the intended meaning, and “data from reseach” is vague without a clear source or finding. These errors sometimes make the intended point difficult to follow. Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling; simpler precise wording is more effective than formal phrases used incorrectly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts both longer and shorter sentence forms, including a complex opening sentence and a contrast introduced by “while.” However, control is inconsistent, and several sentences are difficult to understand because of faulty structure. For example, “international sports games brings nations together which was always debatable has now become more controversial” combines clauses without clear grammatical links, and “by meeting even they can learn” has an unclear subject and sentence pattern. There are also agreement and article issues, as in “games brings” and “an elite way,” as well as punctuation problems, including comma splices and missing spaces after commas. Build shorter, complete sentences first, then add subordinate clauses with clear subjects and correct agreement.

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