Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that international sports events, such as The Olympics or the Football World Cup, are a good way to bring countries together. Others say that these events create competition, not friendship, between countries.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In the modern era, A small pro[portion of people opine that international sports. It is good won world cup. In this essay I will discuss both these view. I am in the favor former view.

On the one hand, proponents of the first point views have several reasons to justify their poisitons firstly, they point out that, some people for very benefit a play other country. Play a football world cup and other games won. This create a good relationship other country side people. they help the other sitiuation. They should play the other country people because become a good friendship and create a competition.

On the other hand, If play the together will be other motivate and become a good players. Exaplem chinea made a good team and win the since 1996 win the world cup because they play the other country and relations ship the other country give the more knowledge. Rather than become a good players between countries. sence a good motivate.

To conclude after pondering over deal of delibertion and thoughts. i believe that should a plays other country and become good playes and create a competition and good friendship.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

You state a position—“I am in the favor former view”—and include paragraphs intended to discuss both the unifying and competitive effects of international sport. However, the task is only minimally addressed: the first view is described vaguely, and the opposing view is not clearly explained as competition replacing friendship. The examples, including the claim about China winning the World Cup “since 1996,” are unclear or inaccurate and do not adequately support your points. The conclusion repeats that sport can create friendship and competition without resolving the two views. The response is also 56 words below the required minimum, which leaves too little space to develop the discussion. Explain each view directly, give a relevant, accurate example, and support your opinion with reasons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a basic overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs beginning “On the one hand” and “On the other hand,” and a conclusion. These markers help the reader recognise the intended stages of the essay. However, progression within the paragraphs is difficult to follow because ideas are repeated or left incomplete. For example, “This create a good relationship” is followed by “they help the other sitiuation,” without a clear explanation of who helps whom or how. The second body paragraph also shifts between motivation, team performance, and international relations without showing their connections. Use one clear main idea per paragraph, then explain it with a specific example and a linking sentence. Clearer referencing would also help readers follow your points.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “international sports,” “good relationship,” “competition,” and “motivate,” and you use signposting phrases such as “proponents” and “To conclude.” This shows an effort to discuss the subject rather than relying only on very basic words. However, word choice and spelling errors often make the intended meaning unclear: “a small proportion of people opine” does not accurately introduce the stated debate, while “for very benefit a play other country” is difficult to interpret. There are also repeated, imprecise phrases such as “good players” and “other country.” Build a bank of accurate topic collocations—such as “foster international understanding” and “intensify national rivalry”—and check spelling and word forms before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You make some attempts to form longer sentences and use clauses, for example, “I believe that should a plays other country and become good playes.” You also use basic sentence openings to organise the response. However, sentence structures are frequently incomplete or inaccurately formed, which makes relationships between ideas hard to understand. Examples include “This create a good relationship other country side people” and “If play the together will be other motivate.” Subject–verb agreement, missing articles and prepositions, and unclear verb patterns recur. Capitalisation and punctuation are also inconsistent, as in “In the modern era, A small…” and the lowercase “i” in the conclusion. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with controlled clauses using “because,” “while,” and “although.”

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