Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

This summer your local council organised a series of free concerts in your local park. You attended one of the concerts. The council has asked for feedback about the concerts.

Write a letter to the council giving your feedback. In your letter

• say which concert you attended

• explain why you enjoyed the concert

• make suggestions for improving next summer's concerts

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Dear Sir or Madam,

Thank you for coordinating those wonderful concerts to my community, and I would like to share the feedback.

I attended the programme which performed by the local singers in the town, and it was amazing. I really enjoyed the shows, especially the music was great. They performed the pop music, and played my fevorite song which was sang by Michael Jackson.

The overall performance of the band was excellent, and they could satisfy the majority of audience. I would like to appreciate each of the members in the troop, especially Jack, he was brilliant and also performed well. His vocals and dance were great and it had a good rythem and sink between the music.

Hence, i would like to suggest that the performonace should keep the time untile ou published. T

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the concert as a performance by local singers and explain that you enjoyed the pop music, a favourite Michael Jackson song, and the performers’ singing and dancing. These are relevant details, but the response only partially fulfils the task: the concert is not clearly named, and the reasons for enjoying it are mostly brief praise rather than developed explanation. Most importantly, the suggestion about keeping to the published time is incomplete and unclear, so the request for improvements is not adequately addressed. The response also falls 14 words short of the 150-word minimum. To strengthen the letter, explain the timing issue clearly and add a practical suggestion, such as providing seating or better sound facilities.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The letter has a recognisable sequence: an opening, comments on the concert, and an attempted suggestion. Paragraph breaks help separate these points, and phrases such as “especially” and “Hence” signal relationships between ideas. However, progression is uneven: the second and third paragraphs repeat general praise, while the final suggestion is cut off at “T” and does not form a complete point. Some connections are also awkward, as in “especially the music was great,” which makes the relationship between the ideas unclear. Organise the body around the three requested points, and use each paragraph to develop one point rather than repeating praise. Finish with a complete closing and sign-off.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing a concert, including “local singers,” “pop music,” “vocals,” and “dance.” This gives the reader a basic sense of what you enjoyed. However, the range is limited and several spelling or word-choice errors make parts difficult to understand, including “fevorite,” “rythem,” “sink,” and “performonace.” Some expressions are also unnatural, such as “coordinating those wonderful concerts to my community” and “the members in the troop.” Choose more precise, natural phrases such as “organising concerts for the community” and “members of the band.” Proofreading spelling and using a wider range of concert-related terms would make your feedback clearer and more effective.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple sentences and longer structures, for example, “I really enjoyed the shows” and “I would like to appreciate each of the members in the troop, especially Jack, he was brilliant.” However, attempts to combine ideas often produce faulty sentence structure: the second example joins two independent clauses with only a comma. There are also errors in verb forms and sentence construction, as in “the programme which performed by the local singers” and “the song which was sang.” Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, including the lowercase “i” and the unfinished final sentence. Use complete clauses, check verb forms, and separate ideas with full stops or appropriate conjunctions.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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