Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

This summer your local council organised a series of free concerts in your local park. You attended one of the concerts. The council has asked for feedback about the concerts.

Write a letter to the council giving your feedback. In your letter

• say which concert you attended

• explain why you enjoyed the concert

• make suggestions for improving next summer's concerts

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Sir / Madam

I am writing this to inform you that the concert you organised is so amazing, i attend to the concert of dionela last day. It is so amazing and excellent performance , all the people is shouting and all sing along with his performance. He is so performer because he know how to connect with the crowd, he know how to interact with them and that is so important and also i would like to know you the lights and sounds of the concert is absolutely good because the lights is actually syncing in her song and the other performer is great. But I recommend that you need to more security because there so many outsider on the crowd and some of the crowd is throwing water bottle so maybe you need to add more security next time. but you do a excellent and organised concert i hope this will happen next year. i look forward to hear from you. Thank you and godbless.

sincerely yours, rhonick

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address all three points: you identify Dionela’s concert, explain that the performer connected with and interacted with the crowd, and suggest adding security because of outsiders and bottles being thrown. Your positive comments about the lighting and sound also provide relevant feedback. The main ideas are clear, but some are not fully developed: for example, you could explain more specifically what made the performance enjoyable or how additional security would improve safety. The reference to “the other performer” is unclear because no performer is identified, and the letter could make its purpose and recommendations more precise. Overall, the required content is present, though some points are less fully explained than others.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The letter follows a broadly sensible order, moving from the concert and its positive features to a recommendation and closing. However, most of the content is placed in one long paragraph, so the different points are not clearly separated. The repeated use of “and,” “but,” and “so” makes the progression feel repetitive, and the shift from praise to the security concern could be signposted more clearly. Some references, such as “the other performer,” are difficult to follow. Use separate paragraphs for your experience and suggestions, and connect ideas with more precise transitions such as “In addition” and “However.” This would make the organisation easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough vocabulary to communicate the main message, including relevant terms such as “lights,” “sounds,” “crowd,” and “security.” However, the range is limited and several words or phrases are repeated, especially “amazing” and “concert.” Some choices are unclear or unnatural, such as “He is so performer” and “all the people is shouting,” which make parts of the description harder to understand. The phrase “outsider on the crowd” also does not express the concern naturally. Aim for more precise vocabulary for describing a live performance and crowd safety, and check collocations and word forms. This will help your feedback sound clearer and more appropriate for a formal letter.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

Your message is generally understandable, and you attempt to link ideas in longer sentences. However, the range of sentence structures is limited, and errors occur frequently enough to affect clarity. Examples include “I attend to the concert,” “all the people is shouting,” and “he know how to interact,” where verb forms or subject–verb agreement are incorrect. Articles and sentence boundaries also need attention, as in “you need to more security” and the long sentence beginning “It is so amazing and excellent performance.” Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, including lowercase “i” and “but” after a full stop. Practise accurate past-tense forms and break long sentences into shorter, complete ones.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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