Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

This summer your local council organised a series of free concerts in your local park. You attended one of the concerts. The council has asked for feedback about the concerts.

Write a letter to the council giving your feedback. In your letter

• say which concert you attended

• explain why you enjoyed the concert

• make suggestions for improving next summer's concerts

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to give feedback related to the free concert that I attended this summer in a park .

First of all, On june there was almost every week a concert in our local park. I had attended one of the concert where our traditional culture were reflected through dance and music from which i came to learn a lots of new things regarding our culture. In addition , there was free meal and drinks while concert was going on so we do not need to leave concert for lunch.

I would like to mention that there were a lof of people attending the concert due to which the park you selected was not spacable because of which most of the people returned with disappointment.There was not also proper management for garbage due to which park was full of litter after the concert. Considering the circumstances, I would like you to look into this matter while organising next time.

Thank you souch for

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address the main purpose by identifying a concert featuring traditional dance and music, explaining that you learned about your culture, and suggesting improvements to the venue and rubbish management. These are relevant points, but the response only partly fulfils the task because the specific concert is not clearly identified: “one of the concert” does not say which performance you attended. Your enjoyment is explained briefly, while the suggestions are also general; for example, “look into this matter” does not specify what the council should do. Develop the feedback with a concrete recommendation, such as choosing a larger park or providing more bins and staff to manage waste, and close the letter appropriately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The letter has a recognisable structure, moving from its purpose to the concert experience and then to problems and suggestions. Paragraphing helps separate these points, and phrases such as “First of all” and “Considering the circumstances” signal transitions. However, progression is not always smooth: the opening paragraph does not name the concert, and the final paragraph combines crowding, disappointment, litter, and a broad request without clearly organising the proposed actions. Some linking is mechanical or unclear, particularly the repeated “due to which” and “because of which.” Use simpler, more precise links and group the positive feedback separately from the practical recommendations to make the message easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “traditional culture,” “dance and music,” “management for garbage,” and “litter.” However, the range is limited, and several noticeable word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems make parts of the letter less natural. For example, “spacable” is not an appropriate word for describing a park with insufficient room, and “a lof of people” contains a spelling error. “Free meal and drinks” would be more naturally expressed as “free food and drinks.” Aim for accurate, conventional phrases for crowd size, venue capacity, and waste disposal, and check spelling carefully before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts both simple and longer sentence forms, including the sentence beginning “I had attended one of the concert where…,” but complex structures are often faulty and errors occur frequently enough to affect clarity. Examples include “one of the concert,” where the plural is needed, and “our traditional culture were reflected,” where the subject and verb do not agree. Tense and sentence construction are also inconsistent in “so we do not need to leave concert,” while the final line, “Thank you souch for,” is incomplete. Practise accurate past-tense descriptions and agreement, and make sure each sentence and the closing are complete. Shorter, well-controlled sentences would help communicate your ideas more clearly.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.