Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

This summer your local council organised a series of free concerts in your local park. You attended one of the concerts. The council has asked for feedback about the concerts.

Write a letter to the council giving your feedback. In your letter

• say which concert you attended

• explain why you enjoyed the concert

• make suggestions for improving next summer's concerts

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Respected sir,

Hope you are doing well and enjoying your life. As the Council is organising series of concerts at our park this summer but the Concert that I attended was a music concert with my friends last week.

I enjoyed the music concert as I found my favourite singer Sahir Ali bagha and the environment was quite intertaining as people from different places were there and all having positive energy. The concert was organised on Sunday so majority of people were there to enjoy to release their stress and enjoy together.

As I am a permanent resident here and I know the environment of this area very well so that I can give you few suggestions to improve next summer's concerts.

First of all you need to organise the concerts here in the month of August as this month weather favours the environment and hot that hot so lots of people can join.

Secondly I would say that kindly announce the dates of concerts two to three months earlier so that people can manage their duties accordingly.

Third I would sa the majority of community here as Pakistani nationals so I would suggest to invite Pakistani singers.

Your sincerely

Ahmad shah

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address all three points: you identify the event as a music concert attended with friends, explain that you enjoyed hearing your favourite singer and the lively atmosphere, and offer suggestions about timing, advance notice and performers. These are relevant and give the council usable feedback. Some points, however, are less fully developed than others. For example, the suggestion to hold concerts in August is supported by a comment about the weather, but the explanation is unclear; the recommendation to invite Pakistani singers would be stronger with a reason or an example of the audience’s preferences. The opening also says the council is organising concerts, rather than clearly framing this as feedback on the series that has already taken place. Develop each suggestion with a clear benefit to reach the next level.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter has a coherent overall arrangement: it begins with context, moves to your reasons for enjoying the concert, and then presents suggestions in a separate section. Sequencing phrases such as “First of all,” “Secondly,” and “Third” help the reader follow the recommendations. However, some connections are mechanical, and a few sentences combine ideas without making their relationship clear. For instance, the opening sentence joins the council’s organisation of the series with the concert you attended, while “so that I can give you few suggestions” creates an awkward transition into the final section. Paragraphing is generally helpful, but the closing recommendation could be linked more clearly to the preceding suggestions. Use clearer sentence boundaries and transitions that show how each idea follows from the previous one.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough vocabulary to communicate the main points, including “favourite singer,” “positive energy,” “permanent resident,” and “manage their duties accordingly.” There are also attempts at more specific language about the audience and local conditions. However, noticeable spelling and word-choice problems reduce precision, such as “intertaining,” “sa,” and “hot that hot,” and some expressions are unnatural, including “enjoying your life” and “the environment was quite entertaining.” Repetition of “concert” and “enjoy” also limits variety. Choose more natural collocations and check spelling carefully; for example, describe the atmosphere as “lively” and say that people came to “relax and enjoy the event.” This would make the letter clearer and more polished.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses with “as,” “so that,” and “so,” and the reader can generally understand your message. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly in sentence construction and agreement. The opening, “As the Council is organising series of concerts … but the Concert that I attended…,” is an incomplete and awkwardly joined structure; “the majority of people was there” would also require a more suitable agreement pattern. In “I know the environment … so that I can give,” the clause connection is not well formed. There are also issues with articles and punctuation, such as “organising series” and the comma splice-like joining of ideas. Practise separating long sentences and checking articles, verb forms and clause links to improve accuracy.

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