Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-21
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
This summer your local council organised a series of free concerts in your local park. You attended one of the concerts. The council has asked for feedback about the concerts.
Write a letter to the council giving your feedback. In your letter
say which concert you attended
explain why you enjoyed the concert
make suggestions for improving next summer's concerts
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear Sir or Madam,
Student answer (Band 6.5)
DEAR SIR OR MADAM,
I AM WRITNG THIS LETTER TO SUBMIT MY FEEDBACK FOR FREE CONCERTS ORGANISED BY OUR COUNCIL.
THERE WAS FIVE DIFFERENT CONCERTS AT MY LOCAL PARK BUT I HAPPANED TO ATTEND ONE OF THE CONCERT WHICH WAS NAMED THE SCIENCE STUDIO .IT WAS OVERWHELMED BY STUDNETS.
THE MOST ATTRECTIVE PART ABOUT THE CONCERT WAS THAT THE PERFORMERS WERE PROFESSIONALS FROM DIFFERENT SCIENTIFIC BACKGROUND, THEY EXPLAINED DIFFERENT CONCEPTS OF MACHINES SUCH AS ROCKETS,EARTH MOVERS,HEAVY PRESSURE MACHINES ETC.THEY ALSO DEMONSTRATED HOW THOSE MACHINES WORKS IN REAL LIFE AND WHERE THEY ARE USED.
THE SCIENCE STUDIO CONCERT HAS ALLOWED ME AND MANY OTHERS TO PERSUE INTEREST IN THOSE SPECIFIC FIELD AND I HAVE PLANNED TO ATTEND MORE SIMILAR CONCERT IN NEAR FUTURE.
I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE A SUGGESTION WHICH MIGHT POTENTIALLY HELP IN NEXT YEARS CONCERTS. I NOTICED THE CONCERT WAS PACKED WITH STUDENTS AND PARENTS WHICH MADE ENTRY AND EXIT VERY DIFFICULT SPECIALLY FOR OLDER FOLKS.IF YOU COULD INCREASE EXIT POINTS AT THE NEXT CONCERTS IT WOULD BE REALLY EASY TO LEAVE AFTER THE CONCERT ENDS.OVERALL THE CONCERT WAS WELL MANAGED.
YOURS SINCERELY,
ABBY.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0
You address all three requested points: you identify the “Science Studio” concert, explain that professional performers demonstrated scientific concepts and machinery, and suggest adding exit points. Your positive response is clear, and the detail about older attendees gives the improvement suggestion a practical reason. The explanation of enjoyment is relevant, though it could be extended by describing more specifically what you found engaging or how the demonstrations affected you. The suggestion is also focused, but adding another practical improvement—such as clearer signs or better crowd management—would make the feedback more fully developed. Overall, the letter communicates its purpose and maintains a clear, appropriate position.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0
The letter follows a clear progression: it introduces the purpose, names the concert, explains what made it enjoyable, and then offers an improvement before closing positively. This makes the message easy to follow. Paragraphing also helps separate the main stages of the feedback. Linking phrases such as “The most attractive part” and “I would like to make a suggestion” guide the reader through the ideas, although the repeated use of “the concert” and “also” makes some connections feel less flexible. The long sentence describing the performers and their demonstrations would be clearer if divided into two sentences. More varied referencing and smoother links between the enjoyment and its impact would strengthen the flow further.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use some topic-specific vocabulary, including “performers,” “scientific background,” “concepts,” “demonstrated,” and “exit points,” which helps convey the subject and your suggestion. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “submit my feedback” and “potentially help.” However, noticeable spelling and word-choice errors reduce precision, for example “WRITNG,” “HAPPANED,” “ATTRECTIVE,” and “PERSUE.” Some combinations are unnatural or unclear, including “overwhelmed by students” and “heavy pressure machines.” Choose more accurate collocations, such as “attended by many students” and “heavy machinery,” and check spelling carefully. A broader range of precise descriptive language would make the letter more fluent and natural.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
You use a mix of simple and more complex sentence forms, including a relative clause in “which was named the Science Studio” and a conditional suggestion beginning “If you could increase exit points.” The main message remains understandable, but some grammatical errors occur. For example, “There was five different concerts” needs subject–verb agreement (“There were”), and “one of the concert” needs a plural noun (“concerts”). In “how those machines works,” the verb should agree with the plural subject (“work”); “has allowed me and many others to pursue” also needs a more suitable tense in this context. Review sentence boundaries and punctuation, especially where a comma joins complete clauses. Greater accuracy in these patterns would improve control.
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