Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

This summer your local council organised a series of free concerts in your local park. You attended one of the concerts. The council has asked for feedback about the concerts.

Write a letter to the council giving your feedback. In your letter

• say which concert you attended

• explain why you enjoyed the concert

• make suggestions for improving next summer's concerts

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Dear Sir,

Yesterday night, i attended music concert in my local part which is organised by you. I am pleased to give feedback on the music concert which i had atteneded . It was extremely mesmerising and beautiful concert . the jamming on radha rani and krishna bhajan was so good i and my family including my little daughter enjoyed it throughly, we all were dancing and singing along with the band and they were also calling the attendees to the stage to join them on stage where i also got an opportunity to join them and sing along.I want to request plaase call them again and oraganised more concerts like this so that we can have some enjoyment and relaxation again and again in between from our busy and stressed life. We are so thankful to the entire team for this incredible and congratulations to the whole team for this sucessful event. Looking forward for such more concerts.

Regards

Aditi Bhatnagar

Resident of abc

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You cover the main points by identifying the event as a music concert, describing your enjoyment of the bhajan performance and audience participation, and asking the council to organise similar concerts again. These details make the letter relevant and convey a positive response. However, the concert is not identified very precisely, and the suggestions for next summer are limited to repeating the same kind of event. The task asks for feedback and improvements, but you do not propose practical changes, such as better seating, clearer scheduling, or a wider range of music. The reason for your enjoyment is also mostly listed rather than developed. Add specific, useful suggestions and explain what made the performance especially successful.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The letter follows a recognisable format, with a greeting, feedback, a request, and a closing. Its ideas are generally relevant, and the sequence moves from describing the concert to expressing a wish for future events. However, almost all the content is placed in one long paragraph, so the different purposes of the letter are not clearly separated. Several ideas are joined in a run-on sequence, particularly the description of your family dancing and your own invitation onto the stage. The transitions are also limited, and the final request and thanks feel crowded together. Use separate paragraphs for the concert experience and recommendations, and divide long sentences so each point is easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some expressive vocabulary to communicate enthusiasm, including “mesmerising,” “beautiful,” “enjoyment,” and “relaxation.” The references to the bhajan and to joining the performers also give the account some specific detail. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which makes parts of the letter less natural. For example, “the jamming on” is unclear in this context, “this incredible” is incomplete, and “such more concerts” is not idiomatic. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “atteneded,” “throughly,” and “sucessful.” Choose precise phrases such as “the performance of the bhajans” and proofread spelling and word forms to make your meaning consistently clear.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to combine ideas using clauses, for example when explaining that your family enjoyed the concert and that you were invited onto the stage. This shows an effort to use more than short, simple sentences. However, the range is limited, and complex sentences are often poorly controlled: the long sentence beginning “the jamming on radha rani” joins several complete ideas without clear punctuation. There are frequent errors in articles, sentence boundaries, capitalisation, and verb forms, such as “i attended music concert” and “which is organised by you.” These errors sometimes make the reader work to understand the relationships between ideas. Practise accurate sentence boundaries and basic article and tense patterns before extending sentences.

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