Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

This summer your local council organised a series of free concerts in your local park. You attended one of the concerts. The council has asked for feedback about the concerts.

Write a letter to the council giving your feedback. In your letter

• say which concert you attended

• explain why you enjoyed the concert

• make suggestions for improving next summer's concerts

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Sir or Madam,

First of all thank you for arranging such a wonderful concert. Overall the concert was good.

I had attended Atif Aslam's concert, as he is my favourite singer, it was my dream to meet him and you made it come true.

I enjoyed the concert as the park was beautifully decorated and the vibe was totally matching with the concert's theme. I was mesmerized with Atif Aslam's voice, it was so soothing to hear him in live concert. Additionally the food stalls was quite diversed and tasty, I attended the concert with my friends, so we tried different foods and beauty accessories stalls was cherry on the top, all my friends group had a good shopping.

Overall, it was good but there is small suggestion for the next summer's concert, As the crowd was overwhelming, the crowd management could be handled in better way. As some of my friends who were standing behind was not able to enjoy much. So this could be improved in the future.

Thanks and Regards,

Shenaz

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address all three points: you identify Atif Aslam’s concert, explain that you enjoyed the setting, performance and stalls, and suggest better crowd management. The reasons are relevant and the personal detail about attending with friends makes the feedback engaging. The suggestion is also supported by the example of friends at the back being unable to enjoy the show. However, the concert type is not described beyond naming the performer, and the improvement point is less developed than the praise: you could explain how the council might manage the crowd, such as adding stewards or creating clearer viewing areas. The letter is appropriately framed for the council, though a more consistently formal tone would strengthen it further. Overall, the task is covered, but some ideas need fuller development and precision.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter has a clear overall sequence: appreciation and identification of the concert, reasons for enjoying it, then a suggestion for next summer. Paragraphing helps distinguish these functions, and linking expressions such as “Additionally” and “Overall” guide the reader. The progression is generally easy to follow, but some connections are awkward or repetitive. For example, “Overall” appears both near the beginning and before the suggestion, while the long sentence about food and beauty-accessory stalls combines several ideas without clear separation. The reference to “some of my friends who were standing behind” is understandable, but the location and crowd problem could be linked more explicitly. More controlled sentence division and varied transitions would make cohesion smoother and less mechanical.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for a personal feedback letter, including expressive choices such as “mesmerized,” “soothing,” “beautifully decorated” and “crowd management.” These help convey enthusiasm and identify a practical concern. There are also attempts at less common or vivid phrasing, such as “cherry on the top,” although this is not the natural idiom; “the icing on the cake” would be more appropriate. Some word forms and collocations are inaccurate, including “diversed,” “in live concert” and “beauty accessories stalls.” These do not prevent the reader from understanding your meaning, but they reduce precision and naturalness. Aim for standard collocations and check word forms, especially when describing facilities and the live performance.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, and the main message remains clear. However, some grammatical errors occur in longer sentences and in agreement. For example, “the food stalls was” should use a plural verb, and “all my friends group had” needs a clearer subject construction. The sentence beginning “I had attended” is awkwardly joined to the explanation that follows, creating a run-on structure; separating it into two sentences would improve control. There are also issues with articles and sentence boundaries in “hear him in live concert” and “there is small suggestion.” These errors rarely obscure meaning, but more consistent agreement, article use and punctuation would make the letter more accurate. Practise building complex sentences without joining several clauses with commas.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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