Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

This summer your local council organised a series of free concerts in your local park. You attended one of the concerts. The council has asked for feedback about the concerts.

Write a letter to the council giving your feedback. In your letter

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear sir or madam,

I am writing to you my feedback about concerts which were held in park in my town.

I am farvinder singh. Last sunday, in my town there was music concert in national park located in jalandhar. It was in evening time i went there after my office work. I am music lover and i was fascinating to listen different kind of music at the concert. i listen hindi and punjabi songs in diffrent voice.

I love the decoration of the park where concert was held in night time. It was coverd with colourful lightning. The most thing i had enjoy there was a plenty of games to play for adults and children which was very cheap tickets.

I want to give some suggestions for next concert i faced some lack of food shops. People were waiting for long que to take their turn. You should arrange some more shops for food to the upcoming concert.

I hope you will make some changes as soon as possible.

Yours sincerely,

Farvinder singh

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address all three requested points: you identify the concert as a music event in Jalandhar’s national park, explain that you enjoyed hearing Hindi and Punjabi songs and seeing the decorated park, and suggest adding more food stalls. These details make the letter relevant and its purpose clear. However, some points are less fully developed than others. The reason you enjoyed the music is stated mainly as being a music lover, and the games are mentioned without explaining how they contributed to your experience. The improvement suggestion is also limited to food queues; you could explain how extra stalls or better queue management would help visitors. Developing these ideas with a little more specific detail would make the feedback more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter has a clear overall arrangement: an opening purpose, a description of the concert and your experience, a paragraph of suggestions, and a polite closing. This makes the main message easy to follow. Some connections between ideas are less smooth, however. For example, the shift from enjoying the park’s decoration to mentioning games and ticket prices feels abrupt, and the suggestion paragraph runs several ideas together without clear punctuation. The repeated use of “I” to begin sentences also makes the progression somewhat mechanical. Use clearer links between related details and separate the problem from the proposed solution—for example, explain the long queues first, then recommend additional food stalls.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough vocabulary to communicate the main experience, including “concert,” “colourful,” “games,” and “food shops.” There are also attempts at more descriptive language, such as “different kind of music” and “colourful lightning,” but some choices are inaccurate or unnatural and occasionally make the meaning less clear. “Fascinating to listen” does not express that you found the music enjoyable, while “cheap tickets” is unclear in the context of free concerts. Spelling errors such as “diffrent” and “coverd” also reduce accuracy. Aim for more precise collocations and check spelling; describing the music as “enjoyable” and the park as “decorated with colourful lights” would communicate your meaning more naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You communicate the main events using mostly simple sentences and make some attempts to combine ideas, such as “I am music lover and i was fascinating to listen different kind of music.” However, sentence structures are often incomplete or joined without appropriate punctuation, particularly in “I want to give some suggestions for next concert i faced some lack of food shops.” There are also errors with articles, verb forms, and tense, as in “in park,” “I listen,” and “I had enjoy.” Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, including lowercase “i” and sentence beginnings. These errors do not prevent the reader from understanding the overall message, but greater control of sentence boundaries and past-tense forms would improve accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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