Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

This summer your local council organised a series of free concerts in your local park. You attended one of the concerts. The council has asked for feedback about the concerts.

Write a letter to the council giving your feedback. In your letter

• say which concert you attended

• explain why you enjoyed the concert

• make suggestions for improving next summer's concerts

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Sir/Madam,

This year in summer you arranged a series of concerts in our park. Unfortunately I could not attend all of them, but I went in last show with my family.

It was a great experience. I attended musical concert in which pakistani and turkish artist came. They played both cultural and hiphop music which we enjoyed, my kids were dancing on turkish music. It was really fun and a nice way for family to unwind all their stress. It was just few minutes walk from my house, therefore we do not had any issue of parking but overall there was plenty of parking so no one was worries about it.

I would like to give some suggestions to improve it for coming year. Firstly I observed that people had problem of water. You can arrange a watr tank near by entry gate so everyone can easily refill water bottle. Furthermore you should place more garbage boxes on multiple locations, which makes it easy to put plastic bottles and coffee cups in there. This year people throw all waste in park which damage the beauty of park.

I hope that you will consider my suggestions.

Yours faithfully,

Ahmed Ammar

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You address all three requirements: you identify the final concert, describe why you enjoyed it, and offer practical suggestions for next summer. The details about Pakistani and Turkish performers, your children dancing, and the family-friendly atmosphere make your positive response clear. Your recommendations about providing water and adding more rubbish bins are relevant and supported by the observation that waste was left in the park. This gives the letter a clear purpose and develops its main ideas. To strengthen the response further, explain a little more about the concert itself—for example, what made the performances especially enjoyable—and make the suggestions more specific, such as indicating where bins should be placed or how water could be supplied.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The letter is organised in a clear sequence: an opening explains which event you attended, the next paragraph describes your experience, and a separate paragraph presents suggestions before a suitable closing. Linking expressions such as “Firstly” and “Furthermore” help readers follow the recommendations, while “therefore” connects the parking detail to its result. The progression is easy to understand throughout. Some connections could be smoother: the parking information interrupts the account of the music and family experience, and “This year people throw all waste in park” would connect more clearly if its relationship to the need for extra bins were stated directly. Grouping related details more tightly and varying transitions would make the cohesion more flexible and less dependent on explicit linkers.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the concert experience and suggestions, with relevant expressions such as “cultural and hiphop music,” “unwind,” “refill water bottle,” and “garbage boxes.” These choices help convey the main points, but the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems reduce precision. For example, “went in last show” is not a natural way to describe attending the final concert, and “water tank” may not clearly convey a drinking-water station. “People throw all waste” and “damage the beauty” also sound awkward in context. Aim to use more natural phrases for events, facilities, and litter, and check spelling and word forms so your meaning is consistently clear.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, including a reason clause in “which we enjoyed” and a result introduced by “therefore.” The overall meaning remains understandable, but errors occur across verb forms, articles, agreement, and sentence construction. For example, “we do not had” should use a consistent past form, and “people throw all waste” needs a past-tense verb to match “This year.” In “a musical concert” and “a few minutes’ walk,” articles and noun forms also need attention. Some sentences join several ideas with commas, making the structure less controlled. Practise checking tense consistency in past-event descriptions and build accurate complex sentences with clear clause boundaries.

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