Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

This summer your local council organised a series of free concerts in your local park. You attended one of the concerts. The council has asked for feedback about the concerts.

Write a letter to the council giving your feedback. In your letter

• say which concert you attended

• explain why you enjoyed the concert

• make suggestions for improving next summer's concerts

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Sir/Madam

I am writing to provide feedback regrading the recent musical concerts organized by local council in the community park.

I would like to appreciate the efforts of our management to make this event unforgettable as they arranged varieties of music programs for the first time in the town.

Although there were five different musical bands representing their own cultures and themes, The Himalayan Rock band was the major attraction for me as they were singing the old folk song of Himachal Pradesh which my grandmother was used to sing.

I spent my full night at the concert and enjoyed various variety of food stalls there. Additionally, many local handicraft shops were available for shopping. I brought my parents to the event and we spent quality time there wile listening famous music and did some quality shopping.

I would like to provide some suggestions to make this event more enjoyable and memorable for the next summer. Firstly, organizers should install some rides for the children during the concerts. Secondly, security personnel must be employed for the sake of the individuals safety.

Thank you so much for this lovely event, I hope you will consider these suggestions for the next concerts.

Yours faithfully

Dany

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You address all three points clearly: you identify the Himalayan Rock band, explain your personal enjoyment through its Himachali folk songs and time with your parents, and suggest children’s rides and better security. The reference to a song your grandmother used to sing gives the feedback a personal, relevant reason for enjoying the concert. Your suggestions are also practical, though the security point would be stronger if you explained what specific concern it would address. The opening and closing make the purpose of the letter clear. To develop the response further, add a little more detail about the concert itself—for example, what made the performance memorable or how the proposed improvements would benefit attendees.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter follows a sensible progression from its purpose, to the concert you enjoyed, and then to suggestions for next summer. Linking expressions such as “Although,” “Additionally,” and “Firstly” help readers follow the points, and the closing returns appropriately to the council’s request. This gives the response a coherent overall arrangement. However, the middle section combines several ideas—food stalls, handicraft shops, family time, and music—in one paragraph, so the main reason for enjoying the concert becomes less prominent. The sequence could be clearer if you grouped the performance and personal enjoyment together, then described the other attractions separately. Some transitions, particularly “Firstly” and “Secondly,” are functional but somewhat mechanical; more natural links would make the letter flow more smoothly.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for giving feedback, including “major attraction,” “folk song,” “handicraft shops,” and “security personnel.” These choices communicate the main ideas and show attempts to use more specific language. Some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or repetitive, however: “varieties of music programs” and “various variety of food stalls” are awkward, while “provide feedback regrading” contains a spelling error and an unnatural phrase. “Quality” is also repeated in “quality time” and “quality shopping.” These issues do not prevent understanding, but more precise, natural phrasing would improve the letter. Aim to check spelling and choose collocations that fit the context, such as “a range of musical performances” and “enjoyed the food stalls.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a subordinate clause in “Although there were five different musical bands…” and a reason clause explaining your connection to the folk song. Most ideas remain understandable, and the suggestions are expressed clearly. Some grammatical errors persist, though. For example, “organized by local council” needs an article, “my grandmother was used to sing” uses the wrong verb pattern, and “while listening famous music” is missing a preposition. The sentence beginning “I brought my parents…” also shifts awkwardly between “we spent” and “did.” Review articles, verb patterns, and prepositions, and make sure coordinated actions have parallel forms. These corrections would make your varied sentences more consistently accurate.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.