Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

This summer your local council organised a series of free concerts in your local park. You attended one of the concerts. The council has asked for feedback about the concerts.

Write a letter to the council giving your feedback. In your letter

• say which concert you attended

• explain why you enjoyed the concert

• make suggestions for improving next summer's concerts

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Council Manager,

I hope this email suits you well. My name is Rahul Sharma and i am living in Niagara Region from more than 10 years. The Concert you have arranged in our community is an amazing and wonderful . It's has won many heart of our neighbourhood, however, I usally attend this concert every year in mid of June.

Furthemore, I have attended your 16th June concert at evening with my family members. This concert has the most admirable in my journey. Not only, My kids really enjoyed a lot , The arrangements was so preety and most beautiful by the staff, Moreover, Everyone from the concert team was so sportive and helpful towards to old people and kids.

Additionally i want you to next time , need little bit more arrangements like , Drinking water, Fan , and more space as the park was small for the crowds.

Thanks,

Rahul

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You cover all three required points: you identify the concert as the one on 16 June, explain that your children enjoyed it and that staff helped older people and children, and suggest providing drinking water, fans and more space. These details make the letter relevant and give the council useful feedback. However, some points are less fully developed than others. The reason you enjoyed the concert is expressed mainly through general praise such as “most admirable,” without explaining what made the performance itself enjoyable. Your suggestions would be stronger if you explained how these facilities would improve comfort or crowd management. The opening also refers to attending every year, which makes it less clear whether you are describing this particular concert or a recurring event.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: it opens with context, moves to your experience of the 16 June concert, and ends with suggestions. Paragraph breaks help distinguish these functions, and linking expressions such as “Furthermore” and “Additionally” signal progression. However, some connections feel mechanical or unclear. “However” does not express a clear contrast in the opening, while “Not only” is left without a matching “but also” structure. The long sequence of praise in the second paragraph also makes the relationship between the ideas difficult to follow. For clearer progression, use fewer connectors and organise the feedback into distinct points, with each sentence explaining one idea.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of relevant vocabulary, including “arrangements,” “neighbourhood,” “helpful” and “crowds,” and your meaning is generally understandable. There are also attempts at more expressive language, such as “admirable” and “sportive,” but these choices are not always natural in context. Phrases such as “won many heart,” “the most admirable in my journey” and “more arrangements” are unclear or imprecise, while “preety” contains a spelling error. These inaccuracies limit the precision of your message, even though the reader can usually infer your meaning. Aim for natural collocations and specific descriptions—for example, describe the performance as enjoyable and the staff as supportive, then name the facilities you would like added.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including “Not only…” and a sentence beginning “however,” but some grammatical errors make parts of the letter difficult to read. Examples include “i am living … from more than 10 years,” “It's has won,” and “The arrangements was,” which show problems with tense, verb forms and subject–verb agreement. The sentence beginning “Not only” is incomplete, and several clauses are joined in ways that obscure their relationships. There are also inconsistent capitalisation and punctuation choices, such as capitalising “Concert” mid-sentence and placing spaces before commas. Practise accurate basic sentence patterns first, then use complex structures only when you can complete and punctuate them clearly.

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