Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

This summer your local council organised a series of free concerts in your local park. You attended one of the concerts. The council has asked for feedback about the concerts.

Write a letter to the council giving your feedback. In your letter

• say which concert you attended

• explain why you enjoyed the concert

• make suggestions for improving next summer's concerts

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Sir or madam,

I hope you are doing well.

I am writing this letter to express my concern regarding the concerts held by local government in our local park.

Although city council played a vital role in organising a number of concerts irrespective of the age which all are quite enjoyble and praised by local people, I, due to hectic schedule, was only able to visit concert taken place on Friday at 6pm.

The reason why it was enjoyable is that firstly, there were numerous my favourite songs played on which dancers performed which made it feel real.Secondly, there were my favourite singers took over the stage and made more special for me,

However, I would like to suggest some measures to improve upcoming summer's concert. Firstly, there should a little increase in security arrangements including CCTV cameras and Perssonnel, which not only make local residents feel safer but also inculcate a fear among those who try to rob things in the concert. Secondly, music system can be improved as sometimes voice was buffering which was destroying the taste of music from making it feel original.

Thank your for considering my suggestions.

Your faithfully,

Manpreet

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address all three requested points: you identify the Friday 6 p.m. concert, explain that favourite songs and singers made it enjoyable, and suggest better security and sound equipment. These ideas are relevant and the purpose of giving feedback is clear. However, some points are less fully developed than others. For example, the concert description is brief and does not explain what made the performances especially memorable, while the security suggestion would be stronger with a practical detail about staffing or crowd management. The opening says you are expressing “concern,” although the letter is mainly positive feedback and suggestions; a more accurate purpose statement would make your position clearer. Overall, the task is covered, but some ideas need fuller explanation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter has a coherent overall arrangement: it opens with its purpose, describes the concert, then moves to suggestions and a closing. Sequencing words such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” and “However” help readers follow the main points, and the paragraphs broadly separate the different functions. This meets the lower-band expectation of clear overall organisation and shows some features of more flexible progression. To make the flow more natural, avoid relying on formulaic transitions and connect each suggestion more directly to its effect. The long sentence beginning “Although city council…” is difficult to follow, and the shift from enjoyment to “However” is slightly abrupt. Clearer sentence boundaries and more precise links between ideas would strengthen cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range for the letter, including task-relevant expressions such as “security arrangements,” “CCTV cameras,” and “local residents.” There are also attempts at less common phrasing, for example “hectic schedule” and “inculcate a fear,” though the latter is not a natural choice in this context. Several word-choice and spelling errors reduce precision: “concert taken place” is awkward, “voice was buffering” does not clearly describe a sound-system problem, and “enjoyble,” “Perssonnel,” and “Thank your” are misspelled. These do not prevent the reader from understanding your main points, but more accurate collocations and careful proofreading would make the letter sound more natural and polished.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including the opening clause “Although city council played a vital role…” and the relative clause “which not only make local residents feel safer…”. The overall meaning is usually recoverable, but some grammatical errors remain. Examples include “there should a little increase” (missing “be”), “there were my favourite singers took over the stage” (incorrect clause structure), and “which not only make” (agreement with the singular subject “increase”). The sentence about songs and dancers also needs clearer structure and punctuation, particularly the missing space after “real.” Use shorter, controlled sentences when several ideas are involved, and check verb forms, articles, and clause construction.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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