Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

This summer your local council organised a series of free concerts in your local park. You attended one of the concerts. The council has asked for feedback about the concerts.

Write a letter to the council giving your feedback. In your letter

• say which concert you attended

• explain why you enjoyed the concert

• make suggestions for improving next summer's concerts

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Sir,

I am writing this letter to provide feedback on the series of free concept by the local council in our park this summer. I had the pleasure of attending the live music cobcert featuring punjabi band on 18 August.

Overall, it was extremely good experience. The musicians were very talented, and perforamce created a enjoyable atmosphere.Furthermore, event gave chance to everyone to spend quality time and great way to interact with people in society. I particular enjoyed the traditional old song which remind me the my cultural roots.

Here I would like to suggest some improvement for next summer event to make it more successful. Firstly, there should arrangment of proper seating of elderly people as, they relax and enjoy. Secondly, providing additional food stall and clear water factilies for everyone. Finally, add some bins to throw rubbish.

These chance can be helpful.

Thank you,

Your's Faithfully,

Harvir

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address all three points: you identify the Punjabi band concert on 18 August, explain that the musicians and atmosphere made it enjoyable, and offer suggestions about seating, food, water and rubbish bins. The positive response is clear, and the suggestions are relevant. However, some ideas are less fully explained than others: for example, you mention extra food stalls and water facilities without saying what problem they would solve, and “These chance can be helpful” does not clarify the expected benefit. The enjoyment section includes a personal detail about the traditional song and your cultural roots, which helps make the feedback specific. To strengthen the letter further, explain the practical value of each suggestion and use the requested opening, “Dear Sir or Madam,” rather than “Dear Sir.”

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The letter has a clear overall progression: an opening that states its purpose, a paragraph describing the concert, and a final paragraph with suggestions. Sequencing words such as “Furthermore,” “Firstly,” “Secondly,” and “Finally” help readers follow the points. The paragraphing is also appropriate for a short formal letter. Some connections are less smooth, however. “Here I would like to suggest some improvement” leads into a list, but the final sentence, “These chance can be helpful,” does not clearly refer back to the suggestions or explain their effect. A few ideas within the enjoyment paragraph are joined in a way that makes their relationship unclear. Use complete, clearly linked sentences and make references such as “These changes” precise to improve the flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “talented,” “atmosphere,” “quality time,” “traditional,” and “cultural roots.” These choices help convey both your enjoyment and the community value of the event. However, spelling errors and inaccurate word forms are noticeable, including “concept,” “cobcert,” “perforamce,” “arrangment,” and “factilies.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise, such as “clear water factilies” and “spend quality time and great way to interact.” These issues make parts of the letter less clear and limit the precision of your vocabulary. Proofread carefully, and choose natural collocations—for example, “drinking-water facilities” and “a great way to interact with others”—to express your ideas more accurately.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of sentence forms, including a relative clause in “the traditional old song which remind me…” and a sequence of suggestions. The main message remains understandable, but some grammatical errors affect clarity and control. Examples include missing articles in “it was extremely good experience” and “event gave chance,” subject–verb agreement in “song which remind,” and incomplete structures such as “Firstly, there should arrangment of proper seating” and “Secondly, providing additional food stall…” The sentence beginning “Furthermore” also lacks a clear grammatical link between its ideas. Practise building complete sentences with a subject and finite verb, and check articles, agreement, and singular/plural forms. More accurate control of these patterns would make your varied ideas easier to read.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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