Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

• give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience

• explain what help you hope your mentor can give

• suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Mr. Smith,

I hope you are in radiant of health! Since, I am a newly hired employee of Empire Dental, I am delighted to give introduce myself before our initial meeting.

In my previous role as an administrator at Dass Dentistry, Stoneycreek, I gained valuable experience in dental administration, patient service and direct claim billing to insurance. Additionally, I also gained hands-on practice with Abeldent software and coordinating with dentist and hygienist. In terms of my education, I have completed post-secondary diploma in office administration health services where I learnt about medical transcription, electronic medical records and patient confidentiality, which are highly desirable skills required for my current position.

I would be over the moon if I can get your guidance and support on my employment goals moving forward. Furthermore, I expect you to assist me in building strong bond with patients.

Before I initially start working I would like to arrange an informal meeting at the cafe located beside our clinic on November 10th morning at 9am. Therefore, we can have a great conversation about how I can contribute in an effective manner to run our clinic smoothly.

Looking forward to meeting you.

Yours sincerely,

Kirandeep Kaur

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You address all three required points and maintain a clear, appropriate purpose: you introduce your previous dental-administration experience and studies, explain the support you want, and propose a specific first meeting. Details such as your experience with insurance claims and patient confidentiality make the background relevant, while asking for guidance with career goals and patient relationships gives the mentor a clear role. The meeting proposal is also practical and includes a time and place. To make the ideas more fully developed, explain more specifically what kind of career guidance you need or how your mentor could help you build rapport with patients. The letter is complete and relevant, though some requests remain general.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The letter has a clear progression from introduction, to your background, to the support you hope to receive, and finally to meeting arrangements. Paragraphing helps distinguish these purposes, and linking expressions such as “Additionally” and “Furthermore” make the relationships between ideas clear. The closing is appropriate for a professional letter. Some connections are less smooth: “Since” at the start of the second sentence does not clearly express the intended relationship, and “Therefore” makes the final sentence sound like a consequence rather than a purpose for meeting. You could improve flow by using more natural transitions and linking the meeting proposal directly to the topics you would like to discuss.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

You use a suitable range of workplace and dental-administration vocabulary, including “direct claim billing,” “medical transcription,” “electronic medical records,” and “patient confidentiality.” These details show some flexibility and help communicate your experience precisely. You also attempt more expressive phrases such as “over the moon,” although this is rather informal for a professional introduction. Several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, including “in radiant of health,” “give introduce myself,” and “building strong bond.” These do not prevent understanding, but they limit the naturalness and precision of the letter. Aim for conventional professional phrasing and check that each verb and noun combination is idiomatic.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and more complex sentence forms, including a relative clause in “where I learnt about…” and a sentence explaining why the skills are relevant to your position. The main message remains clear, but some grammatical errors occur. For example, “Since, I am…” has incorrect punctuation and an awkward clause opening; “I would be over the moon if I can get” needs a consistent conditional form; and “Before I initially start working” combines time expressions awkwardly. There are also missing articles in “completed post-secondary diploma” and “building strong bond,” as well as a number-agreement issue in “coordinating with dentist and hygienist.” Review articles, conditional verb forms, and sentence openings to improve accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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