Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

• give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience

• explain what help you hope your mentor can give

• suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Sir or Madam,

My name is John. I just joined the workplace last week. I am writing to provide you with some information about me.

Firstly, I joined the company as an Operations Manager. About my qualification, I completed my masters in security operations. I have strong security operational skills of more than 15 years. I worked with two major companies of GTA for almost 12 years. I also worked with Peel Regional Police for 6 months.

I always want to learn more and polish my security operational skills. As I am kind of new to this workplace and need some assistance until I will get familiarize with the operational procedures. Therefore, I would request that kidnly support me during my initial days so that I could utilize best of my experience at this workplace and assist the company with more operational needs.

Finally, I would request it if you could arrange few presentation slides reflecting the company's security and operational procedures. it would help me in such a better way to go through with the organization's background more clearly.

I am look forward to hearing from you.

Yours faithfully,

John.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You provide relevant background, including your master’s degree, more than 15 years of experience, and work with two companies and Peel Regional Police. You also indicate that you want support learning workplace procedures. However, the task is addressed only minimally overall: the request for presentation slides does not clearly explain what guidance you hope your mentor will provide, and it is not a suggestion for a first meeting. No time, date, or meeting format is proposed. The letter also does not clearly introduce you to the mentor as a colleague, and “Dear Sir or Madam” is impersonal when you have been given the mentor’s details. State what you hope to discuss or learn, then suggest a specific arrangement for meeting.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter has a recognisable structure: an opening, paragraphs about your experience and support needs, and a closing. Sequencing words such as “Firstly” and “Finally” help signal the progression, and the main points can generally be followed. However, the progression is not fully effective because the final paragraph requests slides rather than moving naturally to the required first-meeting arrangement. Some links are mechanical, particularly the repeated use of “I would request,” and “Therefore” does not connect smoothly to the preceding sentence. The reference in “it would help” is understandable but could be made clearer by naming the slides. Organise the body around the three requested points and use more direct transitions between them.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of workplace-related vocabulary, including “Operations Manager,” “security operations,” “operational procedures,” and “organization’s background.” These terms make your professional context clear, and the reader can understand your main message despite some inaccurate or unnatural choices. For example, “polish my security operational skills” and “utilize best of my experience” are not natural collocations, while “presentation slides reflecting” is an unclear way to describe the information you want. There is also a spelling error in “kidnly.” Aim for more precise, natural phrases such as “develop my skills,” “make the best use of my experience,” and “an overview of the company’s procedures.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both short statements and longer sentences, including a conditional construction in “so that I could utilize…” and a subordinate clause beginning “As I am kind of new…”. The overall meaning is usually clear, but some grammatical errors and awkward sentence structures reduce accuracy. For example, “until I will get familiarize” has an incorrect verb form; “I am look forward” should be “I look forward”; and “arrange few presentation slides” is missing an article. The sentence beginning “As I am…” is also a fragment when followed by “Therefore” as a separate sentence. Review verb patterns, articles, and sentence boundaries, and try to make complex sentences complete and controlled.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.