Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

• give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience

• explain what help you hope your mentor can give

• suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Maryum,

I am writing to express my sincere gratitude for having you as my mentor. I hope you, as an experienced employee being working in this company for about five years will have much more knowledge about the work and I'm glad to learn a lot from you. I am here to give a brief introduction of myself as a newcomer in this company.

My name is Shaista Jabin; I have completed my degree in Doctor of Pharmacy and M.Phil. in Pharmacology from one of the most top universities, University of Agriculture Faisalabad. I have internships in various institutes including Drug Testing Lab and Aziz Fatima Hospital, from where I got both professional and personal experience. Moreover, I have three years post-graduation experience as a Quality Assurance Officer in Ibex Pharma. During these journeys I gain much knowledge about Sops, safe handling, quality standard sand Good Manufacturing Practices.

I hope my mentor can provide me guidance in achieving my goals, advice on overcoming challenges, constructive feedback on my performance and help me identify my strengths and areas of improvements.

For further information about myself, I'll appreciate, if having a face-to-face interaction in your office depending on your availability. Ideally, we could meet for around 30 to 40 minutes at a mutually convenient time.

Thank you for your assistance in advance. I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours sincerely,

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address all three points: you outline your pharmacy qualifications and work experience, explain the guidance you want, and propose a face-to-face meeting lasting 30–40 minutes. The specific details about your degree, internships, and Quality Assurance role make the introduction relevant and informative. Your request for help with goals, challenges, feedback, and strengths is clear, though it would be stronger if you linked this support more directly to your new role or identified a particular skill you hope to develop. The meeting arrangement is also somewhat general: you defer to Maryum’s availability but do not suggest a specific day or time. These details keep some parts less fully developed, while the letter otherwise covers the task effectively.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The letter has a clear progression from greeting and introduction to qualifications, mentoring needs, meeting arrangements, and a polite closing. Paragraphing helps distinguish these purposes, and linking expressions such as “Moreover” and “For further information” guide the reader through the message. The sequence is easy to follow, and the closing is appropriate for a professional letter. Some connections could be more natural: “I am here to give a brief introduction” repeats the purpose already established in the opening, and the transition into the meeting request is slightly awkward. Overall, the organisation is clear and cohesive; more concise transitions and smoother links between ideas would make the progression feel more effortless.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use a suitable range of professional and field-specific vocabulary, including “constructive feedback,” “Quality Assurance Officer,” “safe handling,” and “Good Manufacturing Practices.” These choices communicate your background and expectations clearly. There are also some inaccurate or unnatural expressions, such as “one of the most top universities,” “during these journeys,” and “areas of improvements.” “Sops” is better presented as “SOPs,” and “quality standard sand” appears to contain a typing or spacing error. These slips do not prevent understanding, but they limit the naturalness and precision of the vocabulary. Focus on standard collocations and careful proofreading, especially when using less common or technical terms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, and the longer sentences generally communicate your meaning. However, some grammatical errors remain. In “you, as an experienced employee being working,” the verb construction is incorrect; use “who has been working.” The sentence beginning “For further information about myself, I'll appreciate, if having…” is also structurally unclear and needs a complete clause, such as “I would appreciate the opportunity to meet…” There are further issues with articles and forms, including “I have internships” and “areas of improvements.” Punctuation around the conditional phrase in the meeting request is also awkward. Improving control of verb forms and complete sentence structures would make the letter more accurate and polished.

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