Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

• give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience

• explain what help you hope your mentor can give

• suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Amy,

I am one of new employees who just joined the company last month. I was told by Human Resource Department that you will be my mentor. I am great to have you as my mentor. I heard you have been working in this company for 20 years since you graduated from university. Hence I am glad to have a guidance and support from you.

Here are some of my personal details for your reference. I was a chinese educated when I was in my secondary school. After graduation, I proceeded to New Zealand to further education in accountancy. I hold a degree in Accountancy. To work as a sales representative in this company, I do not have any experience.

Morever, this is my first job. I hope I can get your guidance from zero as fresh new staff. I am looking forward to learn from you. In additon, I understand from HR department that most of the new employees who were under your guidance are a very successful sales person. I forecast I will be one of the successful sales person too.

Lastly, I appreciate to have a meeting with you to discuss about thing I need to prepare.

Your sincerely,

Penny

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response successfully covers all the bullet points outlined in the prompt. Penny begins by introducing herself and providing a brief outline of her educational background, noting that she studied accountancy in New Zealand after attending a Chinese-educated secondary school. She also mentions that this is her first job and that she has no prior experience as a sales representative. Furthermore, she clearly explains what help she hopes to receive, expressing a desire to learn 'from zero' and gain guidance from her mentor. Finally, she suggests a first meeting by stating, 'I appreciate to have a meeting with you to discuss about thing I need to prepare.' All parts of the prompt are addressed in a natural tone, earning a solid Band 6.5, rounded to 6.0 due to some under-development of ideas.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter maintains a coherent overall arrangement with clear paragraphing that serves the purpose of the letter well. Penny uses standard salutations and sign-offs appropriate for a workplace correspondence ('Dear Amy' and 'Your sincerely,'). Paragraphs are logically divided into an introduction, educational and professional background, expectations, and a call to action for a meeting. However, cohesive devices are sometimes mechanical or awkwardly handled, such as the transition 'Morever' and the repetitive use of 'mentor' and 'guidance' in close proximity. Referencing is generally clear, but the logical progression between sentences occasionally falters, placing this securely at Band 6.0.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

Penny uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully communicating her background and intentions. She attempts some less common vocabulary and collocations, such as 'personal details,' 'sales representative,' and 'human resource department.' However, there are noticeable word choice and collocation errors throughout the text, such as writing 'I am great' instead of 'grateful,' 'chinese educated' instead of 'educated in Chinese,' and 'discuss about thing' instead of 'things.' Additionally, 'Your sincerely' contains a minor grammatical slip. These inaccuracies do not impede overall communication, reflecting the descriptors for Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The student demonstrates a mix of simple and some complex sentence forms, such as 'I heard you have been working in this company for 20 years since you graduated from university.' There are several grammatical errors and awkward phrasings throughout the text, including article omissions ('by Human Resource Department'), incorrect prepositions ('look forward to learn' instead of 'learning'), and minor tense issues ('I appreciate to have' instead of 'I would appreciate having'). While these errors are frequent, they rarely impede communication. The control over punctuation is generally acceptable, supporting a Band 6.0 score for grammatical range and accuracy.

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