Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.
Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter
give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience
explain what help you hope your mentor can give
suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear....... ,
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Dear Amit,
i hope you are doing well, i want to tell you something about myself. first of all, i complete my studies in Lambton college, Toronto in specialized in IT expert. afterwards i have two year experience in multinational company in Brampton that they basically sale precious woods.
secondly, i recently joined that company where you work. you are my senior not only in work also experience as well. i really like your leadership style that you carry while distribute the work also your business ideas are beyond the mark. i cannot even think about that much. thirdly, you always co operative with staff you knew that which staff will do which task. there are countless things that i want to learn from you.
lastly, if you feel comfortable i will arrange meeting with you after office. please let me know which day you have some time. i really look forward for your response. thank you for your time
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You cover the three requested points: you mention your studies at Lambton College and previous work, describe the support and learning you hope to receive, and suggest meeting after work. The letter is relevant and the reader can understand your purpose. However, the study and work outline is brief and partly unclear, while the help you want is expressed mainly as general admiration—“there are countless things that i want to learn”—rather than specific career support. The meeting suggestion also leaves the day and format open without offering a concrete option. Develop these points with a clearer account of your background, one or two specific mentoring goals, and a proposed time or place.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The letter has a recognisable overall structure, moving from your background to your new role and then to the meeting request. Paragraph breaks help separate these topics, and expressions such as “first of all,” “secondly,” and “lastly” signal progression. However, this sequence of numbered transitions feels mechanical, and some links between ideas are unclear. For example, the paragraph about your mentor shifts from leadership to work allocation and staff skills without explaining how these observations connect to the help you seek. Use more natural transitions and group related details together. A clearer progression from introduction, to specific mentoring needs, to a practical meeting proposal would make the letter easier to follow.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use enough vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including terms relevant to work such as “leadership style,” “business ideas,” and “experience.” There is also some attempt to use descriptive language, for example “beyond the mark.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, which makes parts of the letter less clear: “specialized in IT expert,” “sale precious woods,” and “co operative with staff.” Some phrases are also vague, such as “tell you something about myself” and “countless things.” Aim for precise, natural expressions suited to a professional letter, such as describing your qualification, the company’s business, and the particular skills you hope to develop.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, and the overall message remains understandable. However, errors occur frequently in basic sentence construction, verb forms, capitalisation, and punctuation. For example, “i complete my studies” needs a past-tense verb, while “they basically sale” has an incorrect verb form and an unclear clause structure. The sentence beginning “you are my senior not only in work also experience as well” is difficult to follow because its comparison is not formed correctly. Capitalise “I” and sentence beginnings, and use full stops to separate complete ideas. Practise accurate past-tense descriptions of your education and work, then build longer sentences using clear conjunctions.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.