Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

• give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience

• explain what help you hope your mentor can give

• suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 7.0)

Dear Mrs Smith,

I hope you find this letter well. My name is Sumandeep Kaur working as a Senior Sales Executive, joined 2 weeks ago. I have been assigned under your mentorship by the authorities. I would like to share my expectations and arrange a meeting with you.

Since the start date, I have heard a lot about mentorship program and how it has benefited the employees. To tell you a little about myself, I have completed a bachelor's degree in trade. Later, I worked in an automobile company as a sales manager for 3 years. My role there was to answer queries from customers, provide them with their desired requirements and maintaining transparency while closing deals.

I would like to share some brief expectations which I want to achieve under your mentorship. In my previous job, I struggled a lot to present my thoughts confidently while dealing with high-profile clients. I want to overcome this disposition in my personality to represent the organization and benefit it as whole.

In order to have a deeper conversation about my expectations and your guidance I would like to meet you in person. Kindly, inform me with your availability, I would be happy to work around it.

I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours sincerely,

Sumandeep Kaur

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You address all three requested points: you outline your commerce degree and three years as a sales manager, explain that you want to become more confident with high-profile clients, and ask to meet in person. The purpose is clear and the details about your previous role make the introduction relevant. The request for support could be more specific—for example, you could ask for advice on presenting to clients or opportunities to observe your mentor. The meeting arrangement is also incomplete: asking for availability is polite, but suggesting a day, time, or place would make the proposal more practical. These details would develop the ideas more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.5

The letter is organised in a clear sequence: introduction, background, mentoring goals, meeting request, and closing. Paragraphing helps the reader follow each part, and transitions such as “To tell you a little about myself” and “In order to have a deeper conversation” make the progression easy to understand. The ideas connect logically, although some linking phrases are slightly formulaic, particularly the repeated framing of what you would “like to share.” You could make the flow more natural by moving directly from your background to the specific skills you hope to develop, then proposing a concrete meeting arrangement. Overall, cohesion is handled flexibly and the message remains easy to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

Your vocabulary is adequate for a professional introduction, with useful workplace terms such as “mentorship,” “high-profile clients,” “closing deals,” and “transparency.” These choices communicate your experience and goals clearly. Some collocations and expressions are less natural or precise, however: “find this letter well,” “assigned under your mentorship,” and “desired requirements” do not sound idiomatic in this context. “Disposition in my personality” is also an awkward way to describe a confidence issue. Aim for conventional professional phrasing and more precise verbs, such as saying you have been “paired with” a mentor and want to “build confidence when presenting.” This would improve naturalness and control.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and more complex sentence forms, and most of the message is understandable. There are some grammatical errors, especially in sentence construction and verb forms. “My name is Sumandeep Kaur working as a Senior Sales Executive, joined 2 weeks ago” is a fragment-like construction; write, for example, “My name is Sumandeep Kaur, and I joined two weeks ago as a Senior Sales Executive.” In “provide them with their desired requirements and maintaining transparency,” the verb forms are not parallel; use “provide them with what they need and maintain transparency.” The sentence beginning “Kindly, inform me with your availability” also needs a different grammatical pattern: “Please let me know when you are available.” More consistent control of these patterns would strengthen accuracy.

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