Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

• give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience

• explain what help you hope your mentor can give

• suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Scott,

I am writing this letter provide you my breif introduction as you have been assigned as my mentor at our company.

To discuss about my education and professional experience, I have graduated from Bachelor's of Science in Cell Molecular Biology from Univerisity of Toronto in December 2022. After graduating, I have been wroking for Toronto Public Health in diagnostic lab as supervisor and conducted diagnostic tests for mutiple samples on ragular basis with my small team of 4 members.

As my mentor, I am expecting your assistance to guide me and train me for working in clinical research as I am fascinated in drug dicovery. As I have read introduction about you in email provided by the company, your work experience of over 30 years in clinical resarch perfectly fits my areas of interest and would assist me in guiding towards buliding principles and foundation in that area of expertise.

I would like to arrange our first meeting at your cabin located in the M building of our workplcae as I like to be professional with my mentor. I would be prepared to discuss on initial stages and builiding career in clinical research.

Yours faithfully,

Hari Patel

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You address all three requirements: you outline your biology degree and diagnostic-laboratory role, explain that you want guidance in clinical research and drug discovery, and propose meeting in the M building. The purpose and tone are clear, and the reference to your mentor’s 30 years of experience helps explain why their support is relevant. The request for help is reasonably specific, but “guide me and train me” and “building principles and foundation” do not clarify which practical skills or career decisions you most want help with. The meeting suggestion would also be more complete if you offered a day or time and checked the mentor’s availability. Developing these details would make the ideas more fully supported.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The letter has a clear progression: introduction, background, expectations of the mentor, and a proposed meeting. Paragraphing separates these functions effectively, and links such as “After graduating” and “As my mentor” help the reader follow the sequence. The closing is appropriate for a formal first contact. Some transitions are less natural or slightly mechanical, particularly “To discuss about my education and professional experience,” and the long sentence about the mentor’s experience carries several ideas at once. The meeting paragraph also moves quickly from the location to what you would discuss. Use more direct transitions and divide or reshape the longer sentence so each point is easier to process; this would make the cohesion more flexible and less noticeable.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use a suitable range of workplace and academic vocabulary, including “diagnostic lab,” “clinical research,” “drug discovery,” and “areas of interest.” These choices communicate your background and goals clearly, and the tone is generally appropriate for a professional letter. However, several spelling errors—such as “breif,” “Univerisity,” “wroking,” and “resarch”—reduce accuracy. Some combinations are also unnatural: “conducted diagnostic tests for multiple samples” and “building principles and foundation” could be expressed more idiomatically. “Cabin” is not the usual term for an office in this context. Check spelling carefully and learn common collocations for describing experience, training, and career development to make your vocabulary more precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including the sentence beginning “As I have read introduction about you in email provided by the company.” The overall meaning remains clear, and you use past and present forms to describe your experience and current goals. Some grammatical errors remain, however. The opening needs an infinitive construction (“to provide you with”), while “I have graduated from Bachelor’s of Science” has an awkward verb pattern and article use. In “I would be prepared to discuss on initial stages,” the verb does not take “on” in this pattern. The long sentence about your mentor also needs clearer clause structure. Review verb patterns, articles, and prepositions, and proofread sentence boundaries to improve control.

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