Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.
Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter
give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience
explain what help you hope your mentor can give
suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear....... ,
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Dear Sir Esa,
I have joined your hospital last week as a Medical Officer in Anesthesia department. I did my MBBS in 2023 from King Edward medical college. I have work experience of almost 3 years in this department, along with that I have also been working in Intensive Care unit.
I have all the basic knowledge of dealing with patients in operation theater and ICU and basic life saving skills. But I want to learn about the extensive and complicated procedures performed to enhance my capibilities. I am looking for your guidance to learn new skills by utilising my maximum time. As I am new here I also want to know about the rules and regulation of this institute. I hope you will help me in all these matters.
If you are avaibale tommorow after the ward round we can have a meeting in auditorium office around 10:00 am to discuss further plans. I will be waiting for your response.
Yours sincerely,
Ashley.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
You address all three requested points: you outline your MBBS and hospital experience, explain that you want to develop your procedural skills and learn workplace rules, and propose a time and place for a first meeting. These details make the letter relevant and purposeful. The study and work background is clear, but the help you hope to receive is somewhat broad: “learn new skills” and “help me in all these matters” could be supported with more specific goals, such as observing complex procedures or discussing career development. The meeting suggestion is practical, though it would be more complete to check whether the proposed time suits your mentor. The response covers the task well overall, with some ideas less fully developed than others.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0
The letter has a clear progression: you introduce your new role and background, describe the support you want, and finish by suggesting a meeting. Paragraphing separates these functions effectively, and linking phrases such as “But,” “As I am new here,” and “If you are available tomorrow” help guide the reader. The sequence is easy to follow, and the closing is appropriate. To make the organisation more polished, connect related points more smoothly; for example, the transition from your existing skills to the procedures you want to learn could explain how your experience has prepared you for that next step. The phrase “along with that” is somewhat mechanical, and the final meeting proposal could be framed more clearly as a question.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
You use an adequate range of vocabulary for a professional introduction, including relevant terms such as “Medical Officer,” “Intensive Care unit,” “operation theater,” and “life saving skills.” Phrases like “complicated procedures” and “guidance” also communicate your aims clearly. However, some word choices and collocations are imprecise or awkward, including “enhance my capabilities,” “utilising my maximum time,” and “auditorium office.” There are also spelling errors in “capibilities,” “avaibale,” and “tommorow,” which reduce accuracy. Aim for natural workplace expressions and check spelling carefully; for instance, you could say “make the most of my time” and “meeting room.” Your meaning remains clear despite these issues.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
You use a mix of simple and more developed sentence forms, and the reader can understand your background, goals, and proposed meeting. The sentence beginning “As I am new here” shows an attempt to link a reason to your request, while the conditional opening “If you are available tomorrow” is suitable for making a suggestion. Some grammatical errors remain, however. In “I have joined your hospital last week,” the past-time marker calls for a past-tense form; “I have work experience” would be more naturally expressed with “I have almost three years of work experience.” Articles and prepositions also need attention in phrases such as “in Anesthesia department” and “in auditorium office.” Review tense choice, articles, and sentence punctuation to improve control.
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