Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Mr. Brown,

I am writing this letter for my introduction and inform you about my past experiences which are related to this job.

I have done a graduation in paramedics in 2019 from Algoma university situated in Toronto. After that, i worked for Niagara region EMS for 3 years which helped me to learn about patient care management.

I would like to request you for be my mentor because i always get nervous in sitautions where i need to complete the task in given time. Therefore, I need your assistance to complete my upcoming assisgnments on this job in timely order.

I already booked a dinner table for this saturday at famous Italian restaurant in downtown. I would like you to join me at saturday evening so that I can communicate with you and learn leadership skills from you.

Let me know If you are free on weekend for meeting.

Your Sincerely,

Lovepreet

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address all three requested points: you outline your paramedics degree and three years with Niagara Region EMS, explain that you want support with completing tasks on time, and propose a first meeting. The background is relevant, and the purpose of the letter is clear. However, the help you hope to receive is somewhat narrow: “assistance to complete my upcoming assignments” does not explain what kind of guidance or career support you would value. The dinner invitation is specific, but it would be more appropriate to suggest a convenient work-related meeting and offer a choice of times, rather than assume your mentor can attend a Saturday dinner. Developing these points more fully would make the letter more complete and suitable for the workplace relationship.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, a paragraph about your background, one about the support you need, and a proposed meeting. Linking expressions such as “After that” and “Therefore” help show the relationship between ideas, and the reader can follow the message without difficulty. To make the progression more polished, connect the opening more directly to the purpose of introducing yourself, and make the meeting proposal follow naturally from your request for guidance. The final sentence repeats the invitation without specifying a clear alternative arrangement. A more flexible suggestion, such as proposing a time at the workplace and asking what suits your mentor, would improve cohesion and the practical flow of the letter.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough vocabulary to communicate your background and aims, including “patient care management,” “assistance,” and “leadership skills.” However, several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for a professional letter, such as “for my introduction,” “for be my mentor,” and “in timely order.” There are also spelling errors in “sitautions” and “assisgnments,” and “dinner table” is not the natural phrase for reserving a restaurant. These issues do not prevent the reader from understanding the main message, but they limit precision and naturalness. Aim for standard professional collocations and check spelling carefully; this will help you express your requests more clearly and appropriately.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple sentences and longer structures, including the reason-and-result construction “Therefore, I need your assistance…” and a relative clause in “which helped me to learn…”. The main ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors are noticeable. For example, “I would like to request you for be my mentor” has an incorrect verb pattern, and “I would like you to join me at saturday evening” has problems with the preposition and article. Capitalisation is also inconsistent in “i” and “If.” Practise verb patterns such as “ask you to be” and prepositions used with days and times. More accurate control of these forms, alongside your existing sentence variety, would strengthen the letter.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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