Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

• give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience

• explain what help you hope your mentor can give

• suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Pankaj sir,

I am writing this letter to introduce myself to you. I would be grateful to consider you as my mentor during my time with this comapany.

Talking about my past, I completed my Bachelor of Business administration from well-known Sardar Patel university with 8.5 CGPA and also with specialisation in marketing and finance i completed my Masters of Business Administration. Sharing about my experience, I worked as marketing associate with Reliance industry Ltd for 2 years then i jumped in ICICI bank as marketing manager and employed for 4 years.

If i talk about any help or assist i wold like to borrow from you is some tips and tricks to be more useful for organisation i would work. As far as i know you have been working as a mentor for so many colleagues since very long time. I hope you give me adivce about how would i become successful in my career and also help me to know about how to deal with different consumers with politeness and confidently also help me to improve my communication skills as well.

I would like to discuss about a lot of things want to know more about you. I would like to arrange a meeting with you and discuss about my lack of skills and how would i improve that. Also, i would love to seat with you and know how you think and take decision and handle situation better.

I would be great if you join me and spend time with me. I look forward to seeing you soon

Yours faithfully,

Kishan Vaghela

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address all three requested points: you outline your business studies and marketing experience, describe the guidance you want on career development, customer relations and communication, and express interest in meeting. These details make the letter relevant and give the mentor a useful introduction. The request for help is the most developed part, while your proposed meeting arrangements remain vague: you do not suggest a day, time, place or way to coordinate. The opening and closing are present, but “Dear Pankaj sir” and “Yours faithfully” are not fully consistent with the friendly, personal purpose of writing to a named mentor. To strengthen the response, develop the meeting proposal and use a more natural, appropriately warm letter style.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter has a coherent overall arrangement: it moves from your introduction and background to the support you hope to receive, then to a possible meeting. Paragraphing helps distinguish these stages, and phrases such as “Sharing about my experience” and “I would like to arrange a meeting” signal changes in focus. However, several transitions sound mechanical or repetitive, particularly the repeated “I would like” and “Also,” and the long final paragraph combines several meeting-related ideas without a clear sequence. Some references are also unclear, as in “how would i improve that,” where “that” could refer to several skills. Use fewer formulaic transitions and organise the meeting paragraph around a specific proposal and follow-up.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough vocabulary to communicate your background and aims, including terms such as “specialisation,” “marketing associate,” “consumers” and “communication skills.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions, but several choices or collocations are inaccurate or unnatural: “borrow from you” does not mean seek advice, “useful for organisation” is unclear, and “seat with you” is not the intended expression. Spelling errors such as “comapany,” “adivce” and “wold” are noticeable, while repeated general words such as “help” and “discuss” limit precision. These issues do not prevent the reader from understanding the main message, but more accurate collocations and careful proofreading would make the letter clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, for example the sentence describing your degrees and the sentence listing the kinds of guidance you hope to receive. The overall meaning is usually understandable, but control is uneven in the longer constructions. In “with specialisation in marketing and finance i completed my Masters,” the clauses need clearer punctuation and structure; “I worked as marketing associate” also needs an article, and “I would be great if you join me” has an inaccurate conditional construction. Capitalisation of “I” and sentence punctuation are inconsistent. Aim to make complex sentences more controlled by separating related points, checking articles and verb forms, and using punctuation to mark clause boundaries.

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