Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

• give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience

• explain what help you hope your mentor can give

• suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to express my interest to working under your supersition for the posting that I have recently received from your Company site. Apart from this, I believe that you have the talent and supersition to guide me, how to became a good as well as a progressive employee under work related environment.

I am a person who completed his Bachelors in science from Agriculture.Following this, I need some practical experience rather than theoretical knowledge in this field. Recently, I get a chance to working as an Agriculture Assistant in your office. Previously, I have three years of working experience under agriculturte department as a assistant technological manager in Assistant director of Agriculture office,India.

I have heard a lot about your working experience as well as skills in the agricultural field as an agriculture officer for the past ten years. A part from this, i need how to make a co-ordination between farmers upon our schemes and implementing new schemes upon farming techniques in practical agricultural level.

After 2 weeeks, there is a pepper research programme held under trivandrum district.Therefore,I wish i need to meet you, if you have time. Thus,I can explain my other experiences and talents in the resume.

Thanks for your prompt response. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Best Regards,

Sree

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You cover the main purpose of the letter and include relevant information about your education, previous work, the support you want, and a possible meeting. For example, you mention your agriculture degree and three years in an agriculture department, and ask for guidance on working with farmers and applying schemes. However, some points are unclear or under-developed: the request for help is expressed awkwardly, and the meeting suggestion lacks a specific time or clear arrangement. The opening also addresses the mentor as “Sir or Madam” rather than introducing yourself directly to the person whose details you received. Develop the support you hope to receive more clearly and propose a definite meeting time and place to make the letter more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter has a generally coherent structure: it opens with its purpose, then gives your background, explains the mentor’s relevance, and ends with a meeting suggestion and sign-off. Paragraphing helps separate these topics. Some links between ideas are less clear, however. Phrases such as “Apart from this,” “A part from this,” and “Thus” do not always show the relationship between the sentences that follow, and the repeated transitions make the progression feel somewhat mechanical. The meeting paragraph also moves from the research programme to explaining your experience in a résumé without a clear connection. Use simpler, more precise linking, and make each paragraph develop one point in a clear sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use vocabulary relevant to agriculture and workplace development, including “practical experience,” “agricultural field,” and “implementing new schemes.” This gives the letter a suitable subject-specific focus. However, several noticeable word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems make parts difficult to understand. “Supersition” appears to be intended as “supervision” or “mentorship,” while “a good as well as a progressive employee” is not a natural expression. “Co-ordination between farmers upon our schemes” is also unclear, and spellings such as “agriculturte” and “weeeks” reduce accuracy. Choose familiar, precise phrases and check spelling; for example, explain that you want to learn how to communicate schemes to farmers and apply new farming techniques.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, and the reader can usually identify the main message. However, attempts at complex structures are often faulty, and errors in verb forms, articles, and sentence construction sometimes make meaning difficult to follow. Examples include “interest to working,” “how to became,” “I get a chance to working,” and “I need how to make.” These should be recast as “interest in working,” “how to become,” “I recently had the opportunity to work,” and “I would like to learn how to.” There are also problems with sentence boundaries and punctuation, such as “Agriculture.Following this” and “district.Therefore.” Practise accurate basic patterns first, then build longer sentences around them.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.