Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

• give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience

• explain what help you hope your mentor can give

• suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 4.0)

Dear Sir or Madam,

I hope you are doing well.

Recently, I got hired at Sunsource as Hydraulic Technician. I have acquired Fluid process Diploma from Humber college. In addition, I got my graduation in Commerce. Despite to it, for my work skills I have worked on various heavy duty equipments

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You make a relevant start by introducing your new job at Sunsource and mentioning your Fluid Process diploma, Commerce degree, and experience with heavy-duty equipment. However, the letter stops before addressing two essential points: what support you want from your mentor and how or when you would like to meet. Your work experience is also only briefly indicated, with no details about your previous role or responsibilities. The response is substantially below the required minimum length, which contributes to the task being addressed only minimally. To improve, complete all three bullet points with specific information and close the letter appropriately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The opening greeting and short introductory sentences give the response a basic sequence: you greet the mentor, then introduce your employment and education. The linking phrases “In addition” and “Despite to it” show an attempt to connect ideas, but the latter does not clearly express the intended relationship. The response ends abruptly after the reference to equipment, so there is no progression to your expectations or meeting arrangements, and no closing. Organise the letter into a brief introduction, a paragraph about your background and requested support, and a final paragraph proposing a meeting. Clear transitions between these sections would make the message easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use relevant workplace vocabulary, including “Hydraulic Technician,” “Fluid process Diploma,” “Commerce,” and “heavy duty equipments,” so the reader can identify your field and background. However, the range is narrow because the response is very brief, and some expressions are not natural or precise: “got hired” is informal for this letter, while “work skills” does not clearly describe your experience. “Heavy duty equipments” also contains an inaccurate plural form and would be more naturally expressed as “heavy-duty equipment.” Use more specific terms for your previous duties and the guidance you hope to receive, such as career development or technical training, to show greater range and precision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response includes simple sentences and one attempt at a more complex construction, beginning “Despite to it,” but the structure is not grammatically complete or accurate. There are also problems with articles and prepositions in “got hired at Sunsource as Hydraulic Technician” and “acquired Fluid process Diploma from Humber college.” The final sentence fragment, “Despite to it, for my work skills I have worked…,” is difficult to follow and lacks clear sentence structure. These errors do not prevent the reader from understanding the basic background, but control is inconsistent and the range is limited. Practise accurate sentence patterns for describing qualifications and work history, then add varied, complete sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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