Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-21
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.
Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter
give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience
explain what help you hope your mentor can give
suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear....... ,
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Dear john,
Hope you are doing well.
I am writing this letter to introduce myself,as you are my new mentor.I am excited to working with you and I am very glad to have you as my new mentor.
I have completed diploma in mechanical technician course previously from georgian college.After completing that,I have worked as a technician In Southmedic.It was good job but the coworkers were noy good at behaviour,which makes me unpleasant.So,I just walked out from the company last year.
I joined here in last March.Moreover,I believe that the employees working here is far better than previously I got.I am requesting you to teach me about workplace behaviour and how to face an issue inside the company.
I am eagerly waiting to see you soon.furthermore,let me know what is the best time for a first meeting.I am always available on all the working days.So please let me know your available time.
yours faithfully
chandas
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You address all three points in the task: you outline your mechanical-technician diploma and previous technician role, explain that you want guidance on workplace behaviour and handling issues, and ask about arranging a first meeting. The purpose and tone are generally clear and appropriate for writing to a mentor. Some parts are less fully developed than others: for example, you could explain more specifically what career or technical support you hope to receive, rather than focusing mainly on workplace behaviour. The account of leaving your previous job is relevant, but “the coworkers were not good at behaviour” is unclear and could be expressed more tactfully. Adding a little detail about your current role would also make the introduction more informative.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The letter has a coherent overall arrangement: it opens with an introduction, moves to your education and work history, then describes the support you want and closes by proposing a meeting. Paragraph breaks help the reader follow these stages. Some linking is mechanical or not quite logical, however. “Moreover” does not clearly connect your joining the workplace with your request for guidance, and “furthermore” is unnecessary before asking about a meeting time. The reference in “the employees working here is far better than previously I got” is also difficult to follow. Use simpler, more precise links and make the relationship between ideas explicit; this would make the progression smoother.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use enough task-related vocabulary to communicate the main message, including “mentor,” “diploma,” “technician,” and “workplace behaviour.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations sound unnatural or unclear, such as “mechanical technician course,” “good at behaviour,” and “face an issue inside the company.” “Walked out from the company” is also too informal and may suggest an abrupt departure. Choose more precise, natural phrases suited to a professional letter, such as describing your qualification as a diploma in mechanical technology and asking for advice on resolving workplace challenges. Check spelling and capitalisation too, including “noy,” “john,” and “georgian.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, and the main message is usually understandable. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly with articles, verb forms, agreement, and sentence boundaries. For example, write “I completed a diploma” rather than “I have completed diploma,” and “I am excited to work with you” rather than “excited to working with you.” In “the employees working here is,” the plural subject requires “are.” The opening “Hope you are doing well” is an incomplete sentence in formal writing, while “I am writing this letter to introduce myself,as” needs a space after the comma and clearer punctuation. Greater control of these patterns would make the letter more polished.
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