Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-21
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.
Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter
give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience
explain what help you hope your mentor can give
suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear....... ,
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Dear Dr. John,
I hope this letter finds you in your best health. Firsly, i would like to express my gratitude for having an experienced colleague like yourself, as my mentor.
Apart from that, I am mainly writing this letter to introduce myself and walk you through my career path, in order for you to get to know me better. I have just joined this organisation as a junior radiology doctor. I have completed my MBBS degree from an esteemed institution in 2019, followed by my housejob in its affiliated hospital. Afterwards, I cleared my preliminary exams and began my radiology residency in the same hospital. My residency period lasted for about four years including supervised rotations in various areas including Ultrasounds, X-rays, CT scans, MRIs and Mammography. I have gained extensive knowledge and expertise in all these areas, with interventional radiology being my most favourite among all.
As i have mentioned earlier as well, how interventional radiology really excite me and given your extensive experience in the same field, i would really like to gain knowlege from you.
Lets plan a meet up in your office in order to have further discussions regarding how we can make your mentorship really fruitful for me during my journey with your organisation.
Really looking forward to you response. Regards
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 7.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
You address all three requested points: you outline your medical education and residency, explain your interest in interventional radiology and the guidance you want, and propose meeting in the mentor’s office. The specific study and rotation details make your introduction relevant and informative. However, the help you hope to receive is only briefly expressed as wanting to “gain knowledge”; clarify what practical support you seek, such as advice on developing clinical skills or planning your career. The meeting suggestion is also quite general: proposing a day or asking when the mentor is available would make the arrangement more complete. These details would extend the ideas more fully while preserving the clear purpose of the letter.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The letter has a coherent overall structure: an opening, a paragraph about your background, a paragraph on your professional interest, and a closing meeting proposal. The sequence is easy to follow, and phrases such as “Afterwards” help show chronology. Some linking is mechanical or imprecise, however. “Apart from that” does not clearly connect to the opening, and “As I have mentioned earlier as well” is unnecessary because the interest has only just been introduced. The final meeting proposal would flow more naturally if it followed directly from a clearer explanation of the support you want. Use transitions that express the exact relationship between ideas, and make the closing and sign-off distinct.
Lexical Resource: Band 7.0
You show a useful range of topic-specific vocabulary, including “radiology residency,” “supervised rotations,” “interventional radiology,” and “extensive knowledge and expertise.” These choices communicate your background precisely and demonstrate some awareness of professional style. A few expressions are less natural or precise: “walk you through my career path” is conversational, while “gain knowledge from you” and “make your mentorship really fruitful for me” are awkward collocations. There are also spelling slips, including “Firsly” and “knowlege,” which reduce accuracy. Aim for natural professional phrasing and proofread carefully; this would make your vocabulary more consistently flexible and precise.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including the sentence describing your degree, house job, examinations, and residency. Most meaning remains clear, but some grammatical and punctuation errors persist. In “how interventional radiology really excite me,” the verb should agree with the singular subject (“excites”), and the sentence beginning “As I have mentioned earlier as well” is not smoothly connected to the main clause. Capitalisation is inconsistent in “i,” and “Lets plan” needs an apostrophe in “Let’s.” The long sentence listing your training and rotations could also be divided or punctuated more carefully. Review agreement, sentence boundaries, and capitalisation to improve control without sacrificing complexity.
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