Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

• give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience

• explain what help you hope your mentor can give

• suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Mentor,

I hope this letter finds you well! I am a new employee, Hary and have been starting work with you.

I have completed my graduation in Business Management since 2023. I have been worked for two years in same field which helped me to gain experience. I worked as a manger in a Chinease restaurant and I can manage work with patience.

However, I started working as a manager at my previous workplace about one year ago. That is why I want to improve my management skills further. I would be grateful if you could provide me with the checklist of whole responsibilities that I need to keep in mind while working. The checklist would help me to prepare me and I can learn more abouth them with your help.

I would like to request you if you could arrange a meeting when you are availabe. During the meeting, I can easily explain the problems that I usually faced at work. This is also a restaurant, that is why, resposibilities would be the same. In the meeting, you can also let me know that how I can focus on my shortcomings. I would be really thankful to you to consider my letter.

I look forward to hearing from you soon with a positive respose.

Yours Sincerely,

Hary kaa

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address all three requested points: you mention your Business Management studies and restaurant experience, explain that you want to improve your management skills, and ask to arrange a meeting. The request for a responsibilities checklist gives your mentor a specific way to help. However, some details are unclear or not fully developed: you say you have worked in the field for two years, then that you became a manager about one year ago, without clarifying the earlier role. The meeting suggestion is also vague because you ask the mentor to meet “when you are available” rather than proposing a time or format. Clarifying your work history and offering a specific meeting option would make the letter more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, a paragraph about your experience and the support you want, and a final paragraph about meeting. This makes the main purpose easy to follow. Some links between ideas are less effective, however. “However” does not express a contrast between your work history and your wish to improve, and “That is why” repeats the connection rather than developing it. The sentence “This is also a restaurant, that is why, responsibilities would be the same” is difficult to follow and its reference to “this” is unclear. Use simpler, more precise links and explain how your previous restaurant experience relates to the new role. A clearer progression within the final paragraph would also help.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant workplace vocabulary, including “Business Management,” “management skills,” “responsibilities,” and “shortcomings,” and the reader can understand the main message. There are, however, several inaccurate or unnatural choices that limit precision: “a checklist of whole responsibilities” would be more naturally expressed as “a checklist of my main responsibilities,” while “prepare me” does not fit the intended meaning. Spelling errors such as “manger,” “Chinease,” “abouth,” and “availabe” also reduce accuracy. Some phrases, including “with a positive respose,” sound unnatural in a professional letter. Aim for accurate spelling and conventional workplace collocations, and choose wording that clearly expresses the support you want.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, for example, “I would be grateful if you could provide me…” and “During the meeting, I can easily explain…”. The overall meaning remains understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. In “I am a new employee, Hary and have been starting work with you,” the sentence structure and verb form are faulty; “I am Hary, a new employee, and I have recently started work” would be clearer. Other examples include “I have been worked” instead of “I have worked,” and “helped me to prepare me,” where the structure is incomplete or duplicated. There are also errors in articles and sentence boundaries. Check verb forms and build each sentence around a clear subject and verb.

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