Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am Shenaz, a new joinee in this company I look forward to connect with you and your support.

I have completed my master's in food and nutrition and have 4 years of total experience as a Dietitian. After completing my master's I joined at Fitelo as a fresher Dietitian where I worked for 1.7 years handling weight management and disease management clients. After that I used to work as a Nutrition Coach at Imumz, where my role was to handle post-natal mother and children upto 2 years. I joined Reliance Hospital to gain some clinical knowledge and experience.

As mentioned I want to gain clinical knowledge, this is my first hospital experience, I want your support and guidance in knowing the medical nutrition therapy and taking care of critically ill patients and how to handle them.

If you are available on Monday at 1.30pm, post lunch we can meet in the conference number 2. I have notes down few challenges I have, hope we could meet and discuss in detail.

Thanks and regards,

Shenaz

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address all three requirements: you outline your education and work history, explain that you want guidance with medical nutrition therapy and critically ill patients, and propose a specific time and place to meet. The details about Fitelo, Imumz and Reliance Hospital make the background relevant and personal. The request for support is clear, though it could be developed further by identifying one or two practical areas, such as observing consultations or learning hospital procedures. The meeting proposal is also direct, but offering an alternative time would make it easier for your mentor to respond. Overall, the letter fulfils the task, with some points less fully developed than others.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter has a clear overall sequence: introduction, professional background, the support you hope to receive, and a meeting proposal. Paragraphing helps the reader follow these stages, and phrases such as “After completing my master's” and “After that” signal chronology. Some connections are less smooth or precise, however. “As mentioned” does not clearly refer back to a specific earlier point, and the long work-history paragraph would be easier to follow if the roles were linked with more varied transitions. The closing also moves quickly from the meeting suggestion to your notes and challenges. Clearer referencing and a more natural progression between these details would make the cohesion more flexible.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for a professional introduction, including relevant terms such as “weight management,” “clinical knowledge,” “medical nutrition therapy” and “critically ill patients.” These details communicate your experience and goals clearly. There are also some awkward or imprecise choices that limit naturalness, such as “new joinee,” “handling” clients, and “conference number 2.” “Disease management clients” is understandable but could be expressed more precisely. The vocabulary is generally appropriate to the topic, and the specialist terms are a strength; to improve, choose more idiomatic workplace expressions and collocations, especially when describing your role and arranging the meeting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and more extended sentence forms, and the main information is generally easy to understand. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly in sentence boundaries and verb patterns. For example, “I am Shenaz, a new joinee in this company I look forward to connect” joins two independent ideas without suitable punctuation, and “I look forward to connect” needs a gerund form after “look forward to.” In “After that I used to work,” the tense does not fit as naturally as the past simple for a completed role. The meeting sentence also needs clearer punctuation around the time and place. More consistent control of these patterns would make the letter smoother and more accurate.

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