Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Mr. Sumit,

I hope you are doing well. Firstly, thank you for becoming my mentor and I would be happy to inroduce myself to you.

If I talk about my studies and experience, I have completed a Bacholar Degree in Computer Application and worked as a Data Analyst in Intact company. Additionally, I have a Microsoft Power BI certification which I learned data visualization and presentation skills.

I would be thankful if you could support me to grow in my field to become Senior Data Analyst. Basically, I am lacking in management and leadership skills that are essantial for getting higher position in this company.

I would like to suggest that our first meeting could be schedule in confrence room at 3.00 PM on next Monday. Let me know if you can change the timing or date for the meeting. I am grateful that I will be able to take a genuine advice from such a great mentor like you.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

Yours sincerely,

Priya Kaur

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.0
Coherence and Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The letter addresses all three requirements: you outline your degree, Data Analyst experience and Power BI certification; explain that you want support developing towards a senior role, especially in management and leadership; and propose a time and place for a first meeting. The purpose and tone are clear, and the request for advice is relevant. The career goal is supported with a specific skills gap, while the description of your previous work remains brief; adding one example of your responsibilities or an achievement would make this background more fully developed. The meeting proposal is clear, though offering a specific alternative time would make the arrangement easier to confirm.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The information is organised in a clear sequence: introduction, background, mentoring needs, meeting arrangements and a polite closing. Paragraphing helps the reader distinguish these purposes, and transitions such as “Additionally” and “Basically” make the progression easy to follow. The letter also maintains a consistent focus on introducing yourself and establishing contact. To make the flow more natural, avoid relying on formulaic openings such as “If I talk about my studies and experience”; a direct transition like “By way of background” would be smoother. The final paragraph combines the meeting request with thanks, so separating these ideas or making the proposed arrangements more concise could improve cohesion further.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the letter, including relevant workplace terms such as “Data Analyst,” “data visualization,” “management and leadership skills,” and “higher position.” These choices communicate your background and goals clearly. There are, however, some spelling errors and imprecise or unnatural collocations, including “inroduce,” “Bacholar,” “essantial,” “support me to grow,” and “take a genuine advice.” These do not prevent understanding, but they reduce accuracy and naturalness. Aim to check spelling carefully and learn common word partnerships, for example “help me develop” and “receive valuable advice.” More precise phrasing would make your professional tone more convincing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The letter includes a mix of simple and more complex forms, such as “I would be thankful if you could support me” and the relative clause “that are essential for getting higher position.” Most ideas remain understandable, and you use polite conditional language appropriately. Some grammatical errors persist, however. In “I have a Microsoft Power BI certification which I learned data visualization,” the clause needs a clearer structure, such as “through which I learned about data visualisation.” The meeting sentence should read “could be scheduled,” and “on next Monday” needs an article or a different preposition. Review passive verb forms, articles and sentence construction; improving these points would make your varied structures more consistently accurate.

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