Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

• give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience

• explain what help you hope your mentor can give

• suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Sir,

The objective of my writing is to introduce myself briefly. I have done my bachelour in business administration in 2018, afterword I started my masters in marketing management. I could not find job for six months and then I decided to take another topup masters course, which was for one year. Topup course was in human resource management. After that I got a job in government hospital as an administration officer for 2 years and then joined another construction company as a project manager.

As my previous jobs were in management sector, and this new job is a bit different because here I have to work on softwares. Furthermore I would like to know about the police and procedure of this organization. Therefore I need your help to run those programs and how to update our progress in certain application.

I would like to meet you regarding this matter. If you are available we can set meeting on monday morning at 10am or in evening on coffee. You can tell me your convienience.

I look foward to hearing from you.

Yours sincerely,

Ahmed Ammar .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address all three points: you outline your business and HR studies and work history, explain that you need support with workplace software and procedures, and propose a meeting time. The request for help is relevant, especially your mention of learning to use programs and update progress in an application. However, some details are unclear or not fully developed: “the police and procedure” does not explain which workplace processes you mean, and the meeting suggestion “in evening on coffee” is vague. A clearer, more professional introduction and a specific alternative meeting arrangement would make the purpose and requests easier for your mentor to understand.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter has a clear overall arrangement: your background, the support you need, and the proposed meeting each appear in a separate paragraph. This makes the progression easy to follow, and linking expressions such as “After that” and “Furthermore” help connect ideas. The sequence of your education and employment is generally understandable, though the long first paragraph would be clearer if divided or streamlined. Some connections feel mechanical, particularly “Furthermore” and “Therefore,” and “this matter” refers rather vaguely to the support described earlier. Use more natural transitions and make references more precise; the organisation is already coherent, but cohesion is not yet consistently flexible.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant workplace and education vocabulary, including “business administration,” “marketing management,” “human resource management,” and “project manager.” These terms communicate your background effectively. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unclear: “topup masters course,” “the police and procedure,” and “run those programs” do not express your intended meaning naturally. There are also spelling errors such as “bachelour,” “convienience,” and “foward.” These do not prevent the reader from understanding the main message, but they reduce precision and professionalism. Check spelling carefully and choose standard phrases for workplace processes and software support.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of simple and more complex sentences, including a time sequence joined with “after” and a conditional suggestion beginning “If you are available.” The main ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors occur. For example, “I have done my bachelour in… in 2018” uses an unsuitable tense and construction; “I started my masters” needs a more accurate noun form, and “we can set meeting” is missing an article. The sentence beginning “As my previous jobs were…” is also awkwardly connected to the next clause. Practise accurate past-tense descriptions of completed study and work, and check articles and sentence boundaries while retaining your attempts at longer structures.

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