Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

• give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience

• explain what help you hope your mentor can give

• suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Sir,

I am writing to give my required details so that you can know about me and give me some suggestions for my career.

I have done my personal support worker course from NASIT college. I am graduated from Algoma University. I had a masters degree from back home and I am already done its' WES. I have 2 years work experience at Tim Hortons. Now, I am working at Granite Ridge Retirement Home as a PSW from last 6 months. My work permit is left for 1.5 years.

I want to know the different and easiest ways to apply for permanent residence. My workplace is supporting for OINP. Due to this, I have a question whether I should go with this opportunity or apply for express entry according to new rules.

We can meet on upcoming weekend at the Brazilen Cafe if you are available. I heard from my coworkers that you give an excellent suggestion because of having years of experience.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours Sincerity,

Jasdeep

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address all three required points: you outline your education and employment, ask for guidance about permanent residence options, and propose a place and time for a first meeting. The details about your PSW course, university studies, and current role make the introduction relevant, while your questions about OINP and Express Entry give the mentor a clear idea of the support you want. The meeting suggestion is present, but “upcoming weekend” is vague, and you do not offer an alternative if the mentor is unavailable. Some background details, such as your work permit duration, are included without explaining how they relate to your career plans. More development and a clearer, more specific meeting proposal would make the letter more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter has a clear overall sequence: introduction, background, request for advice, meeting proposal, and closing. Paragraphing helps distinguish these stages, and the reader can follow the main purpose without difficulty. Connections such as “Due to this” link your workplace’s support to your question about immigration pathways, although the relationship could be expressed more precisely. The background paragraph moves quickly between education, work history, and permit status, so a clearer order or a brief transition would improve progression. The final meeting suggestion would also connect more smoothly if you first asked about the mentor’s availability and then proposed a specific time. Overall, the organisation is effective, though some links and references are not fully clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the purpose, including relevant terms such as “permanent residence,” “work permit,” “OINP,” and “Express Entry.” These details make your request specific and understandable. There are, however, some inaccurate or unnatural choices and collocations: “give me some suggestions for my career” is less natural than “offer me career guidance,” and “excellent suggestion” does not fit as well as “excellent advice.” “Personal support worker course” and “work experience” communicate your background, but more precise phrasing could make the letter sound more polished. The vocabulary is generally sufficient to convey your meaning, while greater control of common professional expressions and word forms would improve precision and naturalness.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You communicate your main ideas using a mixture of short statements and longer sentences, including the question about whether to pursue OINP or Express Entry. Some grammatical errors remain, but the message is generally clear. For example, “I am graduated from Algoma University” needs a more natural verb form, and “I am already done its' WES” has problems with verb construction and the possessive form. In “I am working … from last 6 months,” the tense and time expression are not correctly formed; use “for the last six months.” The closing “Yours Sincerity” also needs a grammatically appropriate form. More accurate verb forms, articles, and prepositions would strengthen control while retaining your range of sentence structures.

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