Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear john,

How have you been? I hope everything going well with you and your family. I am writing to tell you about i need some advise from you about workplace.

To begin with, i just done my degree in it and my major is web developer, i have vast knowledge about CSS, HTML and JAVA. I have also did digital design in level 2, so i can to photoshop and design. As, i will help you in many projects.

Apart from that, i need help in security ai so if in case any project if i made mistake you can guide me, also you have experience in this filed so many year, so i need help like how to grow in this filed. \

In addition, is it okay if you have time we can meet and and i need to discuss about work and other things. This saturday after job in coffee shop, i will take knowledge and for my side coffee.

Anyway, i would love to hear what you think. see you soon.

Best regards,

Dhruvil

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address all three requested points: you mention your IT degree and design study, explain that you want guidance with security-related work and career development, and propose meeting on Saturday after work. The purpose of the letter is clear, and the friendly closing suits a mentor. However, the study and work background is not fully clear: you describe your qualifications and skills but give little information about previous employment. The help you want is also somewhat vague, and the meeting suggestion lacks a specific time or a clear question about your mentor’s availability. Develop these details so each part of the task is covered more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter has a clear overall sequence: introduction, background, the support you want, and a meeting proposal. Paragraph breaks help distinguish these points, and expressions such as “To begin with,” “Apart from that,” and “In addition” guide the reader through the message. This logical arrangement is a strength. Some linking is mechanical or repetitive, however, and the ideas within sentences are not always connected smoothly—for example, the transition from your skills to “As, i will help you in many projects” is unclear. The meeting paragraph also combines several ideas without a clean progression. Use fewer formulaic transitions and make the relationship between each sentence explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant workplace and study vocabulary, including “degree,” “major,” “CSS,” “HTML,” “digital design,” and “projects,” so the reader can understand your general background and goals. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the message difficult to interpret. For example, “take knowledge” does not naturally express learning from a mentor, and “in this filed” is an incorrect spelling of “field.” “Security ai” is also unclear without explanation. Aim for precise phrases such as “gain experience in cybersecurity” and “develop my career in this field,” and check spelling and natural word combinations before sending the letter.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, and the reader can generally follow the main message. However, errors are frequent, particularly in verb forms, articles, agreement, and sentence construction. Examples include “I hope everything going well,” “I just done my degree,” and “I have also did digital design”; these need forms such as “I hope everything is going well,” “I have just completed my degree,” and “I have also studied digital design.” The sentence beginning “In addition, is it okay if you have time” is also incomplete in structure, while “meet and and” shows a repeated word. Practise accurate basic clauses first, then build longer sentences with clear subjects and verbs.

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