Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor.

Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter

• give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience

• explain what help you hope your mentor can give

• suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear....... ,

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Dear saim ,

I hope you are doing well,I am writing this letter to introduced my self , this is because i am new at your workplace. you all are my mentor and having an experienced colleague . Please give me advice and support in their career. I have done three years diploma in computer science from abroad and some work experience in their , But here i move on just one month ago. This is because at workplace i am new , you all are my mentor and gives them advice and support in their career.Thats is why i need your guideline to understand my position and work , than i will access my goails. Please you suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor.At the and of this week we all are having a tea meeting on our office ,in the evening, All are invited , please come on time and join with ful confident. thank you

Kind regards,

Zahida

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You make an attempt to introduce yourself, mention a three-year computer science diploma and some previous work experience, and ask for guidance. However, the request is only minimally fulfilled: the help you want is vague (“understand my position and work”), and the proposed meeting is unclear because “we all are having a tea meeting” does not specify a direct arrangement with your mentor. Some wording also repeats details from the prompt rather than developing your own message. The response is 148 words, so it falls two words short of the required 150; the 17 words copied from the prompt were not counted. Add relevant detail about your past role, the specific support you need, and a clear time and place for meeting.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The letter follows a broadly recognisable order: introduction, background, request for support, and a meeting suggestion. The closing and sign-off also make the format clear. However, ideas are not arranged coherently throughout, and several sentences repeat the prompt rather than advancing the message, such as “you all are my mentor” and “gives them advice and support in their career.” Connections between ideas are often unclear; for example, “This is because” is used where a direct explanation would be more logical. The meeting details are placed at the end but do not clearly connect to a specific invitation. Use separate paragraphs for your background, support needs, and meeting proposal, and link each idea with clear, accurate transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some vocabulary relevant to the situation, including “diploma in computer science,” “work experience,” “advice and support,” and “guideline.” This gives the reader a basic understanding of your purpose. However, the range is limited, and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unclear, including “access my goails,” “tea meeting,” and “join with ful confident.” Repetition of “mentor,” “work,” and “advice and support” also limits flexibility. Choose precise workplace expressions and check spelling and word forms so your meaning is easier to follow. For example, explain that you want help understanding your role and developing your career, rather than using the unclear phrase “access my goails.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to combine ideas in longer sentences, and the reader can identify the main message despite the errors. However, the range of structures is limited, and attempts at complex sentences are often faulty. Examples include “I am writing this letter to introduced my self,” “you all are my mentor,” and “you all are my mentor and gives them advice,” which show problems with verb forms and subject–verb agreement. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also inconsistent, as in “I hope you are doing well,I am writing…” and the long sequence beginning “This is because at workplace…”. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then connect them with conjunctions. Check agreement, verb forms, articles, and punctuation when editing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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