Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-11-14
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.
Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?
How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In this present era, individuals can get all vitamins and proteins by persuing their healthy diet which includes such as fresh vegetables and fruits as well some physicians also give recemmdetion about this trend.However, several people are added vitamin pills in their diet for getting nourishment.The main reason is hectic schedule behind this.I will discuss the major reason as well how we can mitigate this trend.
Firstly,individuals are extremely busy in their lives for achieving their goals.In the metropolitan cities, vitamin pills sales are risien in few years and the truth behind is long working hours which corporate sector wants from their employee.Due to their hectic schedule, individuals do not have time to make their healthy meals after their work.Not only they are paying more money to purchase this pills which is more expensive than the vegetables but on their lives also. Because, they unable to prepare their proper meals for getting nourishment.Therefore, they begin to take this vitamin pills to maintain healthy.For instance, recent survey conducted in new york regarding this problem was depicts that eighty percent of corparate employees consume vitamin pills which is extremely dangerous for their lives.
However,they can remove this finicial burden from their head by maintain their proper diets. But they need to fix their schedule firstly.If they improve their daily routine and try to finish work early then it would be fruitful for them because they can easily cook their meals at their home in which they can maintain there healty diet as well they do not need spent huge amount of money on synthetic vitamin pills.
In the conclusion, the major behind this treand is hectic routine of every person.When they unable to prepare their meals at their home after that they begin to take vitamin pills. However, they can solve this problem by improving their schedule.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You address both questions and maintain a relevant focus: you identify a hectic schedule as a reason for buying supplements and suggest improving routines so people can prepare meals. The explanation that long working hours leave employees without time to cook is relevant, and the survey example attempts to support it. However, the response only partially develops the task. The reasons are largely limited to lack of time, while the second part offers one main solution without explaining how people could be persuaded—for example, through workplace initiatives, public health information, or practical cooking support. The claim that pills are “extremely dangerous” is also not explained. Develop a wider range of reasons and make the persuasion methods more specific.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, a paragraph explaining the cause, a paragraph proposing a solution, and a conclusion. Sequencing words such as “Firstly,” “However,” and “In the conclusion” help signal these stages. Within paragraphs, the main ideas generally follow a comprehensible order, especially the link between long working hours and limited time to prepare meals. Cohesion is sometimes mechanical, however, and some connections are unclear. For example, “Not only they are paying more money … but on their lives also” does not clearly express the relationship between cost and health. The conclusion mostly repeats the earlier points. Use clearer referencing and connect each supporting detail directly to the paragraph’s main idea.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “hectic schedule,” “metropolitan cities,” “nourishment,” and “synthetic vitamin pills.” These choices show an attempt to discuss work patterns, diet, and supplements rather than relying entirely on basic words. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable and sometimes make the message harder to follow, as in “persuing,” “risien,” “finicial,” and “treand.” Several phrases are also unnatural or imprecise, such as “are added vitamin pills in their diet” and “remove this financial burden from their head.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. A more precise vocabulary range would help you express the cause-and-effect relationships and proposed solutions clearly.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional structure in “If they improve their daily routine … then it would be fruitful” and a cause-and-effect explanation using “Due to.” However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors in basic sentence construction, verb forms, agreement, and punctuation occur frequently enough to affect clarity. For example, “individuals are added vitamin pills” has an incorrect verb construction, while “they unable to prepare” is missing a verb. The sentence beginning “Not only” is also incomplete or incorrectly balanced. Work first on complete clauses, subject–verb agreement, and consistent verb forms; then practise joining ideas with accurate subordinate clauses. Use spaces after punctuation and avoid run-on sentences.
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