Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In recent times, doctors told that a healthy diet can provide all the nutrients and vitamins that we need. In spite of this advice, a small portion of individuals still rely on vitamin tablets and spend considerably large amounts on buying these pills. This essay will not only discuss the reason behind why people spend a plethora of money on vitamin tablets but it also explains how to convince the individuals to start and improve their diet instead of tablets.

One major reason is lack of proper knowledge and time. These days, many individuals does not have a proper knowledge on the nutritious value of their food portion and they were unable to balance their diet with appropriate vitamins, proteins , carbohydrates and fiber. Owing to their busy schedules, they are unable to focus on their diet because a healthy diet plan requires a quality time to spend on and prepare the meal which is high rich in nutrition value and vitamins. A good example for this scenario is, the corporate employees who usually rely on the vitamin tablets instead of diet because of their busy work schedule and inappropriate knowledge on the food supplements. Ultimately, this would lead them to use the short-term methods such as medical supplements through the vitamin pills.

I believe that we can convince the individuals by providing some proper guidance on the advantage of having a healthy diet and the disadvantages of taking the vitamin pills. Proper formal training campaigns to educate the individuals regarding the benefits of healthy diet, Such as how it improves the immune system and increases our life span. On the other hand, we can also educate them on the drawbacks of vitamin tablets like the excessive vitamins may arise some kidney related problems, create stomach irritations and mouth ulcers. For example, the celebrities who follow proper diet have a different face value and build everything naturally in terms of muscle, when compared with the celebrities who under go medical process to look good and main high nutritious value. Ultimately, we can provide the overall pros and cons and motivate them to develop a healthy diet plan.

In conclusion, this trend is mainly caused by insufficient knowledge and lack of effective time management, and I believe that we can address this by providing a proper guidance on the food items such as a training campaign and convince them to create their own diet plan to stick on as it offers significant benefits to the individuals and the society.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for purchasing vitamin pills and methods to encourage dietary changes. The ideas are relevant, such as the lack of time and knowledge, and the suggestion of educational campaigns. However, the development is somewhat uneven. The explanation regarding 'corporate employees' is a good start but could be more deeply explored. The suggestion about celebrities is slightly tangential and lacks a clear link to how this would persuade the average person to change their diet. Overall, the position is clear, and the response covers all requirements of the task effectively.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central theme. There is a clear progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'In recent times', 'One major reason', and 'On the other hand', which help the flow. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical or repetitive, and there are minor issues with referencing (e.g., 'this trend' in the conclusion is clear, but some sentences within paragraphs feel slightly disjointed). Overall, the paragraphing is appropriate and the information is easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task. You use some good collocations like 'nutritious value', 'busy schedules', and 'immune system'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'plethora of money' (plethora usually implies an excess, not just a large amount), 'high rich in nutrition value' (should be 'rich in nutritional value'), and 'main high nutritious value'. These errors do not impede communication, but they prevent the vocabulary from reaching a higher band. To improve, focus on using more precise academic collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('many individuals does not have', 'vitamins may arise some kidney related problems') and tense inconsistencies ('doctors told that'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are minor errors, such as the space before the comma in 'proteins , carbohydrates'. Despite these errors, the meaning remains clear throughout the essay, and the errors do not significantly impede the reader's understanding.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.