Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this modern day world, vitamins pills are a huge market and draws alot of money from people despite, continous guidance by doctors to have a balanced diet. The reason behind this is that vitamins are readily available in the local pharmacies without a prescription and it is an easy compenstaion of a healthy diet. This dilemma can be tackled by real life examples, awarness programs and putting off vitamin pills from pharmacies.

In this fast-paced society where people do not have time they prefer having pills rather than making a meal for themselves. This has enabled vitamin industry to boost over the years to a extent that people now cannot start their day without gulping a vitamin pill. On the one hand, having a balanced diet is much more beneficial for human body, but according to some people they think it is a waste of time because it requires a lot of planning and effort. The other reason of frequent vitamin usage is the easy availibilty of vitamins in pharmacies without prescription.

For instance, in a recent survey in America more people were inclined towards having vitamins because of they were over worked and thought that this is the compensation of a healthy diet.

On the other hand, the solution to this problem is giving people real life examples of an actual patient by theor local general practitioners. This can be done through several awareness programs and real time talk with the people and giving them easy meal prep up recipes. The other way of tackling this situation is that vitamin pills are only be given on prescriptions. This way the doctors can keep a check too if someone is taking unncessary vitamins and people would be more eager to fix their diet. In my own personal example, ever since I have started having more proteinous diet my hair loss has reduced significantly and saved me money as well.

In conclusion, people are spending thousands on vitamin pills inspite of regular emphasis by their doctors to have a healthy diet. This is directed to the easy presence of vitamins in pharmacy without a doctors prescription and people not having time to plan their food. However, it can be managed through several face to face programs given by the doctors and putting a limit to vitamin pills in local pharmacy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt directly: explaining why people spend money on vitamin pills and proposing solutions on how to persuade them to improve their diet. The writer successfully adopts a clear position throughout the essay. Ideas are extended and supported, such as discussing time poverty, ease of access in local pharmacies, and offering practical awareness programs. However, some arguments tend to over-generalise slightly, and the personal example provided could be integrated more smoothly into the broader discussion. Nonetheless, all parts of the task are properly covered, earning a solid Band 7.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay displays a clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, causes, solutions, and conclusion. Cohesive devices are used reasonably well, such as 'In this fast-paced society', 'On the one hand', 'For instance', and 'On the other hand'. However, referencing and transitions are at times slightly mechanical or repetitive, such as the misuse of 'On the other hand' in the third paragraph where it does not contrast with a preceding 'On the one hand'. Overall, the structure remains coherent and easy to follow, fitting the Band 6.5 to 7.0 profile well, thus comfortably achieving a Band 6.5.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'fast-paced society', 'awareness programs', and 'unnecessary vitamins'. However, there are several noticeable spelling and word-choice errors throughout the text, including 'vitamins pills' instead of 'vitamin pills', 'alot' instead of 'a lot', 'compenstaion' instead of 'compensation', 'availibilty' instead of 'availability', 'proteinous' instead of 'protein-rich', and 'inspite' instead of 'in spite'. These errors do not impede communication, but they restrict the lexical score to a Band 6.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some control over relative clauses and conditional structures. However, frequent grammatical errors and awkward phrasing persist throughout the response. Examples include 'vitamins pills are a huge market and draws alot of money' (agreement error), 'according to some people they think' (redundancy), 'because of they were over worked' (extra preposition), and 'vitamin pills are only be given on prescriptions' (passive voice error). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but grammatical inaccuracy prevents the response from reaching Band 6.5, making Band 6.0 the most appropriate descriptor.

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