Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-17
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.
Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?
How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Nowadays, food is becoming less organic and very unhealthy due to large amount of chemicals used on farms. Many doctors tell the general public we should eat healthy food instead of taking vitamin tablets. I will discuss both views in the upcoming paragraph.
To commence with, the day-by-day rate of disease is increasing and people having more vitamin pills and spending a lot of money on them. To explain this, some individuals believe that if they are not taking pills then they will have pain and difficulties, so due to lack of vitamins and minerals those are taking pills even it costs a bit more expensive and people spend half of their salary by yearly. For example, A survey conducted in 2022 - share the information about 70% of public spending their money on buying multivitamins(B12) capsules just because they have muscle pain. Therefore, some of them have been buying tablets for relife from their body pain.
On the contrary, people ought to improve their meal in good quality of vitamins and proteins so, they do not worry about taking vitamins pills. To elaborate this, individuals perused reach quality of diet which is good amount of fibers: green vegetables and beneficial in proteins too. For instance, in a civil hospital- a prominent hospital in India, there is a doctor name is Mr.sing , who always suggest people to have very good amount of green vegetables in your meal once, it will very much help to improve their immunity level. Hence, people should try to understand reach meals help a lot than vitamins pills.
In conclusion, however, spending a lot money in buying medicine for pain is important but i believe that they should change their diet instead of wasting money.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: why people spend money on vitamin pills and how they could be persuaded to improve their diet. However, the introduction introduces a misunderstanding of the prompt by stating 'I will discuss both views', which suggests a traditional 'discuss both views and give your opinion' essay rather than addressing the specific two-question format. Furthermore, the development of ideas lacks clarity and depth. For instance, the argument about people spending half their salary is an unconvincing and extreme generalisation. Examples provided, such as the survey mentioning B12 capsules for muscle pain, are somewhat confused. While the student attempts to cover all parts of the task, the ideas are under-developed and lack logical extension, aligning the response with Band 5.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organized into distinct paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs for each question, and a conclusion. However, overall progression is hindered by awkward and mechanical transitional phrases such as 'To commence with', 'To explain this', and 'On the contrary'. Referencing is sometimes unclear, for instance using 'those are taking pills' and 'some of them have been buying tablets for relife'. While paragraphing is attempted, the relationships between sentences are occasionally obscure, leading to a choppy flow that places the response in Band 5.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for basic communication, but it features noticeable limitations and errors in word choice and spelling. Examples of lexical inaccuracy include 'perused reach quality of diet' (presumably meaning 'pursue a rich quality diet') and 'relife' instead of 'relief'. The student attempts less common vocabulary such as 'multivitamins', 'immunity level', and 'organic', but these attempts are often marred by collocation and spelling issues (e.g., 'spending a lot money'). The lexical range is minimally adequate, supporting a Band 5 score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but frequent grammatical errors restrict the accuracy of the writing. There are issues with subject-verb agreement and clause structures, such as in 'people having more vitamin pills and spending' (missing auxiliary verb) and 'there is a doctor name is Mr.sing'. Punctuation errors are also present, such as capitalization and spacing issues in proper nouns and hyphens. Because complex sentences are frequently faulty and cause some difficulty for the reader, this performance fits the Band 5 descriptors.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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