Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In the past few years, peoples use diffrent kind of foods there is no common food which are used by peoples to fulfill the nutritions. people eat fishs,drink milk thats why the people doesnt need any kind of vitamin pills .I think people uses healthy diest instead of using the vitamin pills beacuse pills are not safe for us and affected our lungs and harm our respiratory system but people in the different country uses widely.

First of All, many european countries are big manufacturers of antibotic medicines .Because people can belief on medicines but according to my mind If we use pills it gives relief for some time but after deficency of vitamin will again start. Many people spends lot of money on vitamin pills Thats the main reason people can't spent our money on healthy diet which is safe for us and it feels better.

Mainly, In the other countries doctors can advice to the peple if you need malnutrition You Can Need Vitamin Pills But don't give this advice you can change your daily diet plan . This is the work for doctors who can guide the nation and people if you want to spend our life better. You Want to need some perfection and take some changes in your daily lifestyle.

In Conclusion, different nations from all countries some can belief on vitamin medicines and on the other hand some are using the healthy diet . But the doctors gave the idea of people you can spends a lot of money on your medicines you can spend all of your money on healthy diet. I want to need some changes in our life. I can take A healthy Diet For Spent My life Better .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, discussing reasons why people spend money on vitamin pills (such as beliefs in medicines) and suggesting ways people could be persuaded to improve their diet (such as doctors providing guidance). However, the development of ideas is limited and at times confusing, such as the claim that 'pills are not safe for us and affected our lungs and harm our respiratory system.' The position is somewhat unclear due to weak expression, and some ideas are repetitive or under-developed. This performance aligns with Band 5 descriptors, as the task is addressed only partially and ideas remain limited.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The response is divided into paragraphs, starting with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the overall progression is difficult to follow, and the logical links between ideas are frequently faulty. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or inaccurately, such as 'First of All' and 'Mainly, In the other countries', which do not function well to guide the reader. Referencing is often unclear, particularly with pronouns like 'this' and 'it', making the relationship between sentences obscure. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion fails to maintain a clear flow. This corresponds to Band 4.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary range is basic and repetitive, frequently relying on simple words and phrases. There are numerous spelling and word-choice errors, such as 'peoples', 'diffrent', 'nutritions', 'fishs', 'diest', 'beacuse', 'affected', 'antibotic', and 'deficency'. These errors and awkward collocations cause difficulty for the reader and occasionally strain comprehension. The writer attempts some less common terms like 'malnutrition' and 'manufacturers', but these are used incorrectly or inappropriately within the context of the sentence. This meets the criteria for Band 4.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The response displays a very limited range of grammatical structures. Most sentences contain significant errors, and attempts at complex structures frequently break down, resulting in ungrammatical constructions such as 'doctors can advice to the peple if you need malnutrition You Can Need Vitamin Pills But don't give this advice you can change your daily diet plan.' Punctuation and capitalization are erratic, and basic subject-verb agreement is frequently violated (e.g., 'people uses', 'pills is', 'doctors gave'). Errors are frequent and often distort meaning, placing this response firmly at Band 4.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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