Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Over the last couple of decades, it has become a common practice between many indivuals to take different types of vitamin pills. Despite of doctors advice that we can get all types a vitamins from different types of fruits, nuts and other routine eatables. This essay discusses the key points, why some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills and how people can be guided to have healthy diet instead of purchasing vitamin pills.

As per my knowledge, many people spend a good amount on multi-vitamins, despite the doctors always advise to improve the healthy diet, by eating seasonal fruits, nuts, vegitables and meat etc. There are some key factors, why people buy vitamins. One of the main reason is that the population living in big cities, in appartments, they did get better opportunities to walk outside, have exposure to the sunlight; so the get deficiency of vitamin D, so to fullfil this gap they use vitamin pills. Similarly, many individual get different deficiencies, which can also be covered using different foods; however, becuase of some strict mindset they feel it easy to take vitamins instead of having healthy diet.

There are numerous ways to persuade people to improve their diet instead of purchasing multiple vitamin pills. Hospitals and different health organizations should organize various events to promote healthy diet awareness. Schools, colleges and universities should also educate the students to eat healthy food. People should be guided to include multiple fruits, vegetables, nuts, fish, and meat in their daily life. Governments and societies should provide healthy environment and the supermarkets should also advertise the benefits of healthy diets. By following these actions we can persuade people to improve their diet instead of having vitamin pills.

In conclusion, it is common in individual of different counties that the prefer to take vitamins instead of healthy diet, but witht he help of health care departments, governments and schools, we can guide the people to have better diet instead of vitamins.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the task: explaining why some people spend money on vitamin pills and suggesting how they can be persuaded to improve their diet. The writer attempts to cover both bullet points, noting lifestyle factors such as lack of sunlight in apartments leading to vitamin D deficiency, as well as proposing educational campaigns through hospitals, schools, and governments. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive, particularly in the second paragraph where the explanation of why people buy vitamins is slightly disjointed. The position is clear throughout, but the depth of support for the ideas places this performance at Band 6.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is divided into four paragraphs with a clear introduction and conclusion. However, progression is sometimes hindered by clunky transitions and mechanical cohesive devices, such as 'As per my knowledge' and 'There are numerous ways to persuade people'. Paragraphing is used sufficiently to separate distinct points, but referencing and logical flow within paragraphs occasionally falter, as seen in the sentence structures of the second body paragraph. Overall arrangement is coherent, earning a Band 6.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms like 'multi-vitamins', 'deficiency', and 'awareness'. However, there are numerous lexical and spelling errors that detract from the precision of the writing, such as 'indivuals' instead of individuals, 'eatables', 'appartments', 'vegitables', 'becuase', 'counties' instead of countries, and 'witht he'. While these errors do not severely impede communication, they reflect a limited control over less common vocabulary and spelling, capping the score at Band 5.5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but grammatical accuracy is a notable weakness. There are several noticeable errors, including redundant prepositions and incorrect conjunctions, such as 'Despite of doctors advice' and 'so the get deficiency'. Punctuation and sentence boundary issues also occur, notably sentence fragments like 'Despite of doctors advice that we can get all types a vitamins...' which lacks a main clause. Frequent non-systematic errors in grammar and article usage place this response firmly at Band 5.0.

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