Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Doctors tell us that we can get all the vitamins we need from having a healthy diet. Despite this advice, some people continue to spend large sums of money on vitamin pills.

Why do you think some people spend a lot of money on vitamin pills?

How could people be persuaded to improve their diet instead of buying vitamin pills?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

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In this modern world, it is significant for individual to have proper healthy diet to live healthy life. Thus, doctors gives advices to have all vitamins in thier daily meals. However, large amount of individual spend lot of money on vitamin pills to complice thier daily requirements. I personally believe that there are some individuals reasons as well as sedentary life style may affect our this circumstances to occurs. Further, I will discuss all reason and the cure for this problem.

First and foremost reason for this is that inadequate diet. Living in busy world, people are busy to take full high protient and high nutritent meal in daily basics. Apparently, this cause them deficency in multiple vitamins and nutrients. For example, study show that over 80% of people working co-operated site are not have thier first meal in properly, resulting causing them various health problems. Another, but significant reason is foods are not enough packed with nutrients as they made with artificial fertilizer. In order to grow crops early and mor widegs, farmer use artificial luse?

fertilizer, also use harmfull chemical, which is not packed with nutritious and vitamins.

To tackle this issue, well balanced diets with organic food products can be satisfied the requirement of all vitamins in body. Individuals can use organic and vegan product which are free from artificial fertilizer and other harmful chemical. Also maintain balanced diet with protein, fats and carbohydrate in general amount of vitamins can comlpike their daily requirements. Secondly, avoiding fast food in daily life, packed food and Junck food doesn't not contain enough vitamins. Also it has high amount of bad and sugar, which eventually harmful for human body. To instant, once study in U.K show that 90% people, who addicted with Junck food and packed food show deficency in B12 vitamins as well as other nutrients.

To sum up, as physician advicer, individual should complike their vitamins requirement through daily meals. Although, sedective like style and improper cultivation of cop crops cause people to buy vitamin form stores. However, well balanced meals and avoiding outdoor food can be great

option for individuals complete their daily vitamins requirements.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task, discussing why people spend money on vitamin pills (such as inadequate diets and artificial fertilizers) and how they can be persuaded to improve their diet (by consuming organic foods and avoiding fast food). However, the ideas are somewhat under-developed and lack depth. For instance, the discussion on artificial fertilizers is abruptly cut off ('farmer use artificial luse?'), and the reasoning tends to be repetitive. While a clear position is maintained throughout, the support provided is basic and would benefit from more thorough explanation to reach a higher band. Overall, the response fulfills the task requirements adequately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt at paragraphing, separating the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, cohesion is frequently faulty and mechanical. For example, transition phrases like 'Further, I will discuss all reason and the cure for this problem' and 'To instant' are awkward and unnatural. Referencing is also unclear at times, such as 'our this circumstances to occurs.' Paragraphing is used, but the internal logical progression within paragraphs is disrupted by grammatical errors and disjointed sentences, limiting the overall flow and organization.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary range is limited and minimally adequate for the task. The student attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'sedentary' (misspelled as 'sedective') and 'deficiency', but these attempts are often marred by spelling and word-choice errors, such as 'complike' instead of 'comply with' or 'fulfill', 'Junck food', and 'protient'. While the meaning can usually be discerned, noticeable errors in spelling and word formation cause some difficulty for the reader and prevent the response from achieving a higher lexical band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but control over grammar and punctuation is weak. Frequent grammatical errors are present throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('doctors gives advices', 'foods are not enough packed'), incorrect prepositions, and incomplete sentences ('farmer use artificial luse?'). These frequent errors can cause difficulty for the reader and mean that error-free sentences are the exception rather than the majority, placing the response firmly in the Band 5 category.

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